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Funny Quotes about Praise

The more you praise and celebrate your life,
the more there is in life to celebrate.
- Oprah Winfrey

Gratitude is the prayer,
while Celebration is the song and the dance of praise.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You can't let praise or criticism get to you.
It's a weakness to get caught up in either one.
- John Wooden

The higher the sun rises, the less shadow it casts;
even so, the greater is the goodness, the less it covets praise;
yet cannot avoid its rewards in honors.
- Lao Tzu

You do ill if you praise, but worse
if you censure, what you do not understand.
- Leonardo da Vinci

Blessed is he who has learned to admire but not envy,
to follow but not imitate, to praise but not flatter,
and to lead but not manipulate.
- William Arthur Ward

Neither blame or praise yourself.
- Plutarch

Completion:
It is time for the project to be over.
You submitted the proposal, you painted your house,
you passed-in the term paper.
Whatever praise or criticism you received,
it is now time to move on to your next project.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of every day's
Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love with a passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints, - I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! - and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.
- Elizabeth Barrett Browning

If a man is proud of his wealth,
he should not be praised until it is known how he employs it.
- Socrates

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
- W. C. Fields

A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.
- Benjamin Franklin

He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.
- Mae West

Don't marry a man to reform him -
that's what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

I am a man of fixed and unbending principles,
the first of which is to be flexible at all times.
- Everett Dirksen

A man is incomplete until he is married.
After that, he is finished.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)

Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln

You can lead a man to Congress,
but you can't make him think.
- Milton Berle

One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Afraid? Me? A man who's licked
his weight in wild caterpillars?
Afraid? You bet I'm afraid!
- Groucho Marx

You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

A man likes his wife to be
just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness,
and just stupid enough to admire it.
- Israel Zangwill

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx

Give a man one rabbit, and he will eat for a day;
give a man two rabbits, and he will
feed his family and his neighbors
and return you 64,768 rabbits in change.
- Anonymous

There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman -
before marriage and after marriage.
- Anonymous

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash

Whenever I date a guy, I think,
"Is this the man I want my children
to spend their weekends with?"
- Rita Rudner

A man is a fool if he drinks before he reaches the age of 50,
and a fool if he doesn't afterward.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy,
the first question I ask myself is:
is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
- Rita Rudner

Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde

A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler

It is sad but unfortunately true that
man learns nothing from history.
- Carl Jung

If I knew for a certainty that a man was coming to my house
with the conscious design of doing me good,
I should run for my life.
- Henry David Thoreau

Books serve to show a man
that those original thoughts of his
aren't very new at all.
- Abraham Lincoln

Clothes make the man.
Naked people have little or no influence on society.
- Mark Twain

I want to be the white man's brother, not his brother-in-law.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Give the right man two fishes and some bread,
and he will feed the world;
give the wrong man two fishes and some bread
and he will invent the fast-food fish sandwich.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When I hear a man preach,
I like to see him act as if he were fighting bees.
- Abraham Lincoln

I would rather trust a woman's instinct than a man's reason.
- Stanley Baldwin

You know your god is man-made when he
hates all the same people you do.
- Anonymous

Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say,
abstains from giving us wordy evidence of the fact.
- George Eliot

If it keeps up, man will atrophy
all his limbs but the push-button finger.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Man is a credulous animal, and must believe something;
in the absence of good grounds for belief,
he will be satisfied with bad ones.
- Bertrand Russell

The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway
is usually a poor judge of distance.
- Laurence J. Peter

Every man prefers belief to the exercise of judgment.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca

A benevolent man should allow a few faults in himself,
to keep his friends in countenance.
- Benjamin Franklin

One man's "magic" is another man's engineering.
"Supernatural" is a null word.
- Robert A. Heinlein

I will far rather see the race of man extinct
than that we should become less than beasts
by making the noblest of God's creation,
woman, the object of our lust.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Man's nature is not essentially evil.
Brute nature has been known to
yield to the influence of love.
You must never despair of human nature.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers,
looks around for a coffin.
- H. L. Mencken

The savage in man is never quite eradicated.
- Henry David Thoreau

I don't advise a haircut, man.
All hairdressers are in the employment of the government.
Hairs are your aerials.
They pick up signals from the cosmos,
and transmit them directly into the brain.
This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.
- the movie Withnail & I

Man is a clever animal who behaves like an imbecile.
- Albert Schweitzer

Stay hopeless and confused. Keep polishing those skills.
- the movie When a Man Loves a Woman (1994)

A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything
and the value of nothing.
- Oscar Wilde

I like a man who grins when he fights.
- Winston Churchill

Man's role is uncertain, undefined, and perhaps unnecessary.
- Margaret Mead

A conservative is a man who is
too cowardly to fight and too fat to run.
- Elbert Hubbard

The civilized man has built a coach,
but has lost the use of his feet.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Never give a sword to a man who can't dance.
- Confucius

Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man,
and I hate people like that!
- Tom Lehrer

The reason why the world lacks unity,
and lies broken and in heaps,
is, because man is disunited with himself.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.