Heaven must be an awfully dull place
if your best friends end up elsewhere.
- Anonymous
To fall in love is awfully simple,
but to fall out of love is simply awful.
- Bess Myerson
It is awfully hard to be brave, when you're only a Very Small Animal.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Marriage is neither heaven nor hell,
it is simply purgatory.
- Abraham Lincoln
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell -
you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
A happy family is but an earlier heaven.
- George Bernard Shaw
Trees are the earth's endless effort
to speak to the listening heaven.
- Rabindranath Tagore
If a man is called to be a street sweeper,
he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted,
or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.
He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts
of heaven and earth will pause to say,
here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
All religions must be tolerated...
for every man must get to heaven in his own way.
- Epictetus
Parting is all we know of heaven, and all we need of hell.
- Emily Dickinson
To see the world in a grain of sand,
and to see heaven in a wild flower,
hold infinity in the palm of your hand,
and eternity in an hour.
- William Blake
It is better to conquer yourself
than to win a thousand battles.
Then the victory is yours.
It cannot be taken from you,
not by angels or by demons, heaven or hell.
- The Buddha
Without stirring abroad,
One can know the whole world;
Without looking out of the window,
One can see the way of heaven.
The further one goes, The less one knows.
- Lao Tzu
Heaven is within us, and we experience it
to the degree that we become conscious of it.
- Ernest Holmes
The quality of mercy is not strained.
It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven
Upon the place beneath. It is twice blest:
It blesseth him that gives and him that takes.
- William Shakespeare
Love like you've never been hurt,
dance like no one is watching,
live as though heaven is on earth.
- Satchel Paige
Dance like no one is watching,
love like you'll never be hurt.
Sing like no one is listening.
Live life like it's heaven on earth.
- Anonymous (various attributions and alternate phrasings)
Sing like no one's listening,
love like you've never been hurt,
dance like nobody's watching,
and live like its heaven on earth.
- Mark Twain
Heaven is under our feet as well as over our heads.
- Henry David Thoreau
Great indeed is the sublimity of the Creative,
to which all beings owe their beginning
and which permeates all heaven.
- Lao Tzu
To everything there is a season,
and a time to every purpose under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die.
- Ecclesiastes 3:1
Thy Return is as another Sun to Heaven;
a new Rose blooming in the Garden of the Soul.
- Omar Khayyam
Dear Father in heaven, I'm not a praying man,
but if you're up there and you can hear me ...
show me the way... show me the way.
- It's a Wonderful Life (1946 movie)
Practice yourself, for heaven's sake in little things,
and then proceed to greater.
- Epictetus
Heaven means to be one with God.
- Confucius
I feel no need for any other faith
than my faith in the kindness of human beings.
I am so absorbed in the wonder of earth and the life upon it
that I cannot think of heaven and angels.
- Pearl S. Buck
There's a big difference between a handout and a helping hand.
One's charity, the other's friendship.
- Little Joe' Cartwright in Bonanza - Rain from Heaven
Trees go wandering forth in all directions with every wind,
going and coming like ourselves,
traveling with us around the sun two million miles a day,
and through space heaven knows how fast and far!
- John Muir
Our life of poverty is as necessary as the work itself.
Only in heaven will we see how much we owe to the poor
for helping us to love God better because of them.
- Mother Teresa
The things that have acquired unity are these:
Heaven by unity has become clear;
Earth by unity has become steady;
The Spirit by unity has become spiritual;
The Valley by unity has become full;
All things by unity have come into existence.
- Lao Tzu
Jesus preached more and taught more
about helping the poor and the sick and the hungry
than he did about heaven and hell.
Shouldn't that tell us something?
- John Grisham
May God grant you always...
A sunbeam to warm you,
a moonbeam to charm you,
a sheltering Angel so nothing can harm you.
Laughter to you.
Faithful friends near you.
And whenever you pray,
Heaven to hear you.
- Irish Blessing
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand
Marriage is a wonderful institution,
but who would want to live in an institution?
- H. L. Mencken
The four most important words in any marriage...
"I'll do the dishes."
- Anonymous
A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler
Marriage has no guarantees.
If that's what you're looking for,
go live with a car battery.
- Erma Bombeck
Marriage is a sort of friendship recognized by the police.
- Anonymous
Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
- Henny Youngman
When two people decide to get a divorce,
it isn't a sign that they "don't understand" one another,
but a sign that they have, at last, begun to.
- Helen Rowland
Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy,
the first question I ask myself is:
is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
- Rita Rudner
I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police
because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife.
- Ilie Nastase
Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
Whenever I date a guy, I think,
"Is this the man I want my children
to spend their weekends with?"
- Rita Rudner
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
- Phyllis Diller
He early on let her know who is the boss.
He looked her right in the eye and clearly said, "You're the boss."
- Anonymous humor
Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein
Always remember the three magic words: You're right dear.
- Anonymous
He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.
- Mae West
(Groom), take (Bride)'s hand and place your hand over hers.
Now, remember this moment and cherish it...
because this will be the last time you ever have the upper hand.
- Anonymous
A man is incomplete until he is married.
After that, he is finished.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
I have often wanted to drown my troubles,
but I can't get my wife to go swimming.
- Anonymous
Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
They have come up with a perfect understanding.
He won't try to run her life,
and he won't try to run his, either.
- Anonymous
A man likes his wife to be
just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness,
and just stupid enough to admire it.
- Israel Zangwill
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
I think men who have a pierced ear
are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
- Rita Rudner
When I eventually met Mr. Right
I had no idea that his first name was Always.
- Rita Rudner
Husbands should be like Kleenex:
soft, strong, and disposable.
- the movie Clue (1985)
Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire
The Wedding March always reminds me of the music
played when soldiers go into battle.
- Heinrich Heine
There are four stages in a marriage.
First there's the affair,
then the marriage,
then children
and finally the fourth stage,
without which you cannot know a woman, the divorce.
- Norman Mailer
You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
One good Husband is worth two good Wives;
for the scarcer things are, the more they're valued.
- Benjamin Franklin
I was married by a judge.
I should have asked for a jury.
- Groucho Marx
One should always be in love.
That is the reason one should never marry.
- Oscar Wilde
A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother
why the bride changed her mind.
What do you mean? responded her mother.
Well, she went down the aisle with one man,
and came back with another.
- Anonymous
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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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