The lion and the calf shall lie down together,
but the calf won't get much sleep.
- Woody Allen
Life ... full of loneliness, and misery,
and suffering, and unhappiness,
and it's all over much too quickly.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall 
Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
I was thrown out of N.Y.U. my freshman year
for cheating on my metaphysics final ...
I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
- the Woody Allen movie Stardust Memories
I don't want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage
is being able to make a right turn on a red light.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
The food at this place is really terrible ...
and such small portions.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
I've become the person I've always hated, but I'm happier.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity
You want to do mankind a real service?
Tell funnier jokes.
- the Woody Allen movie Stardust Memories (1980)
One minute you're in the lunchroom at Glenwood High
and you ... blink and you're 40,
you blink again and you can see movies
at half price on a senior citizen's pass.
Ask not for whom the bell tolls, or to put it more accurately,
ask not for whom the toilet flushes.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity
What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists?
In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.
- Woody Allen
There's nothing wrong with being afraid.
We were meant to be afraid.
- the Woody Allen movie Anything Else
A relationship, I think, is like a shark.
You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall (1977)
I have a very low threshold of death.
My doctor says I can't have bullets enter my body at any time.
- the Woody Allen movie Casino Royale
You have to learn to push the guilt
under the rug and move on,
otherwise it overwhelms you.
- the Woody Allen movie Match Point
I'm going to go in the bathroom and scream.
I'll be out in a minute.
- the Woody Allen movie What's New Pussycat
I think you're the opposite of a paranoid.
I think you go around with the insane delusion that people like you.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
I'm awash in self-contempt!
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity
I don't believe in the after life,
although I am bringing a change of underwear.
- Woody Allen
The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
You have no values. With you its all nihilism,
cynicism, sarcasm, and orgasm.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.
- Woody Allen
Tradition is the illusion of permanence.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once.
- Woody Allen
Money is better than poverty,
if only for financial reasons.
- Woody Allen
I have a very pessimistic view of life.
You should know this about me if we're gonna go out.
You know, I - I feel that life is -
is divided up into the horrible and the miserable.
Those are the two categories, you know.
The - the horrible would be like, um,
I don't know, terminal cases, you know,
and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life.
It's amazing to me. You know, and the miserable is everyone else.
That's - that's - so - so - when you go through life -
you should be thankful that you're miserable
because you're very lucky to be miserable.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
Eighty percent of success is showing up.
- Woody Allen
It's just gossip, you know. Gossip is the new pornography.
- the Woody Allen movie Manhattan (1979)
The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have,
instead of what you don't have.
- Woody Allen
Oh yes, the past can hurt.
But, you can either run from it or, learn from it.
- the movie The Lion King
It was the nation and the race dwelling all round the globe
that had the lion's heart.
I had the luck to be called upon to give the roar.
- Winston Churchill
The unpredictable and irregular happenings
of life's cycles are an inherent part of their nature.
There are droughts and heat waves, injuries occur.
The lion eats the zebra -
one is nourished, one dies - neither failed.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We are all connected in the great Circle of Life.
- the movie The Lion King
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves
for they shall never cease to be amused.
- Anonymous
Law of Contrariness:
Our chief want in life is somebody
who shall make us do what we can.
Having found them, we shall then hate them for it.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I have great hopes that we shall love each other all our lives
as much as if we had never married at all.
- Lord Byron
Sometimes I wonder if we shall ever grow up
in our politics and say definite things which mean something,
or whether we shall always go on using generalities
to which everyone can subscribe, and which mean very little.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Soon we'll be out amid the cold world's strife.
Soon we'll be sliding down the razor blade of life.
But as we go our sordid sep'rate ways,
We shall ne'er forget thee, thou golden college days.
Hearts full of youth,
Hearts full of truth,
Six parts gin to one part vermouth.
- Tom Lehrer - song: Bright College Days,
album: An Evening Wasted With Tom Lehrer
When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart,
and you shall see that in truth
you are weeping for that which has been your delight.
- Khalil Gibran
Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there some day.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted,
every hill and mountain shall be made low,
the rough places will be made straight
and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed
and all flesh shall see it together.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
This too, shall pass.
- Bible
Though lovers be lost love shall not.
- Dylan Thomas
If we are not happy and joyous at this season,
for what other season shall we wait and
for what other time shall we look?
- Abdul-Baha
Nature and human life are as various
as our several constitutions.
Who shall say what prospect life offers to another?
- Henry David Thoreau
Never, never and never again shall it be
that this beautiful land will again experience
the oppression of one by another.
- Nelson Mandela
The essence of philosophy is that a man should so live
that his happiness shall depend
as little as possible on external things.
- Epictetus
Show me a man who knows his own heart
and to him I shall belong.
- Jewel
These men ask for just the same thing,
fairness, and fairness only.
This, so far as in my power,
they, and all others, shall have.
- Abraham Lincoln
Your success and happiness lies in you.
Resolve to keep happy, and your joy and you
shall form an invincible host against difficulties.
- Helen Keller
We must all hang together,
or assuredly we shall all hang separately.
- Benjamin Franklin
A man is relieved and gay when he has
put his heart into his work and done his best;
but what he has said or done otherwise
shall give him no peace.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
What we seek we shall find; what we flee from flees from us.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I am never going to have anything more to do
with politics or politicians.
When this war is over I shall confine myself entirely
to writing and painting.
- Winston Churchill
We know nothing at all.
All our knowledge is but the knowledge of schoolchildren.
The real nature of things we shall never know.
- Albert Einstein
We shall see but a little way if
we require to understand what we see.
- Henry David Thoreau
We shall show mercy, but we shall not ask for it.
- Winston Churchill
Faith is the strength by which a shattered world
shall emerge into the light.
- Helen Keller
Government of the people,
by the people,
for the people,
shall not perish from this Earth.
- Abraham Lincoln
Give me a lever long enough
and a fulcrum on which to place it,
and I shall move the world.
- Archimedes
Lend your voices only to sounds of freedom,
no longer lend your strength to that
which you wish to be free from.
Fill your life with love and bravery,
and you shall live a life uncommon.
- Jewel
Resolve to keep happy, and your joy
and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties.
- Helen Keller
Employ your time in improving yourself by other men's writings,
so that you shall gain easily what others have labored hard for.
- Socrates
To keep the body in good health is a duty...
otherwise we shall not be able
to keep our mind strong and clear.
- The Buddha
When we get piled upon one another
in large cities, as in Europe,
we shall become as corrupt as Europe.
- Thomas Jefferson
We must, indeed, all hang together or,
most assuredly, we shall all hang separately.
- Benjamin Franklin
We shall never know all the good that a simple smile can do.
- Mother Teresa
I must uphold my ideals,
for perhaps the time will come
when I shall be able to carry them out.
- Anne Frank
We shall draw from the heart of suffering itself
the means of inspiration and survival.
- Winston Churchill
Blessed is he who expects nothing,
for he shall never be disappointed.
- Alexander Pope
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.