Enter one or two keywords to search these Funny Quotes.

Hint: keep it simple, like life twain

Funny Quotes about Life
Funny Quotes about Life | Funny Love Quotes | About
Search:   A-   B-   Ca-   Co-   D-   E-   F-   G-   H-    I-    J-K-L   M-   N-O   Pa-   Pr-   Q-R   Sa-   Sk-   T-   U-V-W-X-Y-Z
Follow my Humorous yet Insightful Quote of the Day by Email:

The future ain't what it used to be. ...
by Yogi Berra

The future ain't what it used to be.
- Yogi Berra

If you don't know where you are going,
you might wind up someplace else.
- Yogi Berra

It was impossible to get a conversation going,
everybody was talking too much.
- Yogi Berra

It's like deja-vu, all over again.
- Yogi Berra

You can observe a lot by just watching.
- Yogi Berra

In theory there is no difference between theory and practice.
In practice there is.
- Yogi Berra

If you come to a fork in the road, take it.
- Yogi Berra

It ain't over till it's over.
- Yogi Berra

If the world was perfect, it wouldn't be.
- Yogi Berra

If you ask me anything I don't know,
I'm not going to answer.
- Yogi Berra

You got to be careful if you
don't know where you're going,
because you might not get there.
- Yogi Berra

The time-traveling is just too dangerous.
Better that I devote myself to study
the other great mystery of the universe - women!
- the movie Back to the Future II

Uh-oh. My past is throwing clods at my future again.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The best thing about the future is
that it comes one day at a time.
- Abraham Lincoln

The true meaning of life is to plant trees,
under whose shade you do not expect to sit.
- Nelson Henderson

The future belongs to those
who believe in the beauty of their dreams.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Find a time and place of solitude.
Look into the distance, and into the future.
Visualize the tomorrow you are going to build -
and begin to build that tomorrow, today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is best when I wish neither to hurry the future nor to slow it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I Act with Bold Courage:
Standing in the inspiring vision of my future,
I boldly take every step -
large and small - with courage and intent.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Standing in the inspiring vision of my future,
I boldly take every step - large and small -
with courage and intent.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life - for most people - is their past projected large
onto the movie screen of their future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Our most basic common link is that we all inhabit this planet.
We all breathe the same air.
We all cherish our children's future.
And we are all mortal.
- John F. Kennedy

We work with the people not out of pity
but out of respect for their potential for growth and development,
both as individuals and as communities.
- Jimmy Yen

Nothing is more important in our national life
than the welfare of our children.
- Harry S. Truman (when signing the National School Lunch Act in 1946)

I never think of the future - it comes soon enough.
- Albert Einstein

Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future.
- Oscar Wilde

The girl of my dreams is my mother's shadow,
cast upon the distant movie screen of my future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We are now at a point where we must educate our children
in what no one knew yesterday,
and prepare our schools for what no one knows yet.
- Margaret Mead

CHOOSE your future, and take ACTION -
be the hammer, not the nail.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

"I" is a non-stop storyteller, spinning tales
of the past, the present and the future -
constantly editing, interpreting
and directing this inner movie.
- Josh Baran

The golden age is before us, not behind us.
- William Shakespeare

Don't project your past onto my future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We won't have a society if we destroy the environment.
- Margaret Mead

We stand today on the edge of a new frontier ...
a frontier of unknown opportunities and perils -
a frontier of unfulfilled hopes and threats.
- John F. Kennedy

You can't change the past,
but you can ruin the present
by worrying about the future.
- Anonymous

If humanity does not opt for integrity we are through completely.
It is absolutely touch and go.
Each one of us could make the difference.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

The best way to predict the future is to create it.
- Peter F. Drucker

Know that anger is always fear and frustration.
What if we could lean back into the arms of Spirit
and trust the future?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is no brief candle to me.
It is a sort of splendid torch
which I have got a hold of for the moment,
and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible
before handing it on to future generations.
- George Bernard Shaw

Life is the future, not the past.
- Terry Goodkind

There is a great future in front of you,
you can leave your past behind.
- Joel Osteen

Create your future from your future not your past.
- Werner Erhard

I do not want to foresee the future.
I am concerned with taking care of the present.
God has given me no control over the moment following.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

He who spends time regretting the past,
loses the present and risks the future.
- Quevedo

I choose not to project my past onto my future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Fear not for the future,
weep not for the past.
- Percy Bysshe Shelley

The heart knows nothing of the past,
nothing of the future;
it knows only of the present.
- Osho

Know that life is most joyful when you
neither attempt to hurry the future nor to slow it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Dream with Powerful Vision:
I open my mind to Spirit,
and trust my intuition to deliver inspiring visions of my future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Hate destroys, Love builds.
Hate tears down, Love renews and creates.
Hatred holds no hope for the future.
Love creates Today as its own better future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Who controls the past controls the future.
Who controls the present controls the past.
- George Orwell

Where are you going? Where does your path lead?
You can never know the future, yet wandering aimlessly
is unlikely to be the source of a fulfilling life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Begin building the future through
"conversation for possibility."
- Werner Erhard

Fill your heart with the creative power
to accept the past,
decorate the present
and transform the future.
- Osho

The empires of the future are the empires of the mind.
- Winston Churchill

Do not dwell in the past,
do not dream of the future,
concentrate the mind on the present moment.
- The Buddha

Drive into your future looking at the open road ahead
rather than into the rear-view mirror of your past.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

How paramount the future is to the present
when one is surrounded by children.
- Charles Darwin

The secret of health for both mind and body
is not to mourn for the past,
nor to worry about the future,
but to live the present moment wisely and earnestly.
- The Buddha

Gain happiness by living in the present -
without regret for the past or fear of the future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Believe in yourself,
in your vision for your future
and in your ability to take a small step
each day toward achieving your vision.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I open my mind to Spirit, and trust my intuition
to deliver inspiring visions of my future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I predict future happiness for Americans
if they can prevent the government
from wasting the labors of the people
under the pretense of taking care of them.
- Thomas Jefferson

From one point of view, one individual's vote
doesn't make any difference whatsoever.
The probability of an election swinging
by a single vote is infinitesimal.
On the other hand, if everybody took the attitude
that voting didn't matter, there could never
be a democratically elected government - at all.
So, does your vote matter? You bet your vote matters.
And, at least as much as your vote matters,
your intention for the future of the world matters.
That's so important, it's worth saying again.
At Least As Much As Your Vote Matters,
Your Intention For The Future Of The Entire World Matters.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Every thought we think is creating our future.
- Louise L. Hay

For time and the world do not stand still.
Change is the law of life.
And those who look only to the past or the present
are certain to miss the future.
- John F. Kennedy

Republicans are men of narrow vision,
who are afraid of the future.
- Jimmy Carter

Opening my mind to Spirit, I trust my intuition to deliver
powerful visions of my inspired future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Future generations are not going to ask us
what political party were you in.
They are going to ask what did you do about it,
when you knew the glaciers were melting.
- Martin Sheen

Stop wishing and fearing the future
long enough to be fully present in TODAY.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I like the dreams of the future better than the history of the past.
- Thomas Jefferson


Please sign up on the form below to receive
my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email.

You can also search my large collection of Funny Quotes.

May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Funny Quotes

 


All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.