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Funny Quotes about Truths

Advertisements contain the only truths
to be relied on in a newspaper.
- Thomas Jefferson

Most truths are so naked
that people feel sorry for them
and cover them up,
at least a little bit.
- Edward R. Murrow

All truths are easy to understand
once they are discovered;
the point is to discover them.
- Galileo Galilei

Our compassion and acts of selflessness
take us to the deeper truths.
- Amma

Quotations help us remember the simple yet profound truths
that give life perspective and meaning.
- Criswell Freeman

Truths and roses have thorns about them.
- Henry David Thoreau

The personal life deeply lived
always expands into truths beyond itself.
- Anais Nin

There are trivial truths and there are great truths.
The opposite of a trivial truth is plainly false.
The opposite of a great truth is also true.
- Niels Bohr

All great truths begin as blasphemies.
- George Bernard Shaw

We hold these truths to be self-evident:
that all men are created equal;
that they are endowed by their Creator
with certain unalienable rights;
that among these are life, liberty,
and the pursuit of happiness.
- Thomas Jefferson

When you are tempted to judge,
may you be reminded that we are ALL ONE,
and that every thought you think reverberates
across the universe touching everyone and everything.
- from the Simple Truths movie May You Be Blessed

I am not an advocate for frequent changes in laws and constitutions,
but laws and institutions must go hand in hand
with the progress of the human mind.
As that becomes more developed, more enlightened,
as new discoveries are made, new truths discovered
and manners and opinions change, with the change of circumstances,
institutions must advance also to keep pace with the times.
- Thomas Jefferson [inscribed in the Jefferson Memorial]

It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay,
another falls spectacularly to pieces.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary

The lawyer's truth is not Truth,
but consistency or a consistent expediency.
- Henry David Thoreau

A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
- Will Rogers

Truth is stranger than fiction,
but that is because Fiction is obliged
to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.
- Mark Twain

Man will occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
- Winston Churchill

Bad taste is simply saying the truth before it should be said.
- Mel Brooks

Always speak the truth,
think before you speak,
and write it down afterwards.
- Lewis Carroll

Tell the truth, or someone will tell it for you.
- Stephanie Klein

The rarest quality in an epitaph is truth.
- Henry David Thoreau

My way of joking is telling the truth;
that is the funniest joke in the world.
- George Bernard Shaw

By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin

Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband
a month before she marries him
and what she thinks of him a year afterward,
and you will have the truth about him.
- H. L. Mencken

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
- Mark Twain

Truth is a tendency.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

If you are out to describe the truth,
leave elegance to the tailor.
- Albert Einstein

If you're going to tell people the truth,
be funny or they'll kill you.
- Billy Wilder

All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Truth is beautiful, without doubt; but so are lies.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
- Oscar Wilde

The truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing,
and should be treated with caution.
- J. K. Rowling

Soon we'll be out amid the cold world's strife.
Soon we'll be sliding down the razor blade of life.
But as we go our sordid sep'rate ways,
We shall ne'er forget thee, thou golden college days.
Hearts full of youth,
Hearts full of truth,
Six parts gin to one part vermouth.
- Tom Lehrer - song: Bright College Days,
album: An Evening Wasted With Tom Lehrer

Use the power of your word
in the direction of truth and love.
- don Miguel Ruiz

The words of truth are always paradoxical.
- Lao Tzu

The water in a vessel is sparkling;
the water in the sea is dark.
The small truth has words which are clear;
the great truth has great silence.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Keep the company of those who seek the truth;
run from those who have found it.
- V�clav Havel

Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.
Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
- Oscar Wilde

When a thing is funny, search it for a hidden truth.
- George Bernard Shaw

Having a personal opinion is great.
Believing that one's personal opinion is absolute truth
leads to most of the world's troubles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The goal of education is the advancement of knowledge
and the dissemination of truth.
- John F. Kennedy

Truth is absolute, but only to one person.
My truth is absolute to me, and your truth is absolute to you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Intense feeling too often obscures the truth.
- Harry S. Truman

Every mind must make its choice
between truth and repose.
It cannot have both.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

We take refuge in pride,
because we are afraid to tell the truth to ourselves.
- Kakuzo Okakura

I am sorry to think that you do not get a man's
most effective criticism until you provoke him.
Severe truth is expressed with some bitterness.
- Henry David Thoreau

We are not afraid to follow truth
wherever it may lead,
nor to tolerate any error
so long as reason is left free to combat it.
- Thomas Jefferson

When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart,
and you shall see that in truth
you are weeping for that which has been your delight.
- Khalil Gibran

A man must be both stupid and uncharitable
who believes there is no virtue or truth but on his own side.
- Joseph Addison

Our actions are constrained by fear of reprisal,
but our dreams reveal our true character.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Doubt is the vestibule which we all must pass through
before we can enter the temple of truth.
- Osho

The false can never grow into truth by growing in power.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Truth has no special time of its own.
Its hour is now - always.
- Albert Schweitzer

Half a truth is often a great lie.
- Benjamin Franklin

The truth of the matter is that
you always know the right thing to do.
The hard part is doing it.
- Norman Schwarzkoff

There's a world of difference between truth and facts.
Facts can obscure truth.
- Maya Angelou

I have nothing new to teach the world.
Truth and Non-violence are as old as the hills.
All I have done is to try experiments
in both on as vast a scale as I could.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Love is the ultimate truth at the heart of creation.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Fiction reveals truth that reality obscures.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Believe those who are seeking the truth.
Doubt those who find it.
- Andre Gide

Truth is not only violated by falsehood;
it may be equally outraged by silence.
- Henri Frederic Amiel

The truth is like a scalpel. The truth is painful.
- don Miguel Ruiz

Truth never damages a cause that is just.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

If you seek truth, you will not seek
victory by dishonorable means,
and if you find truth, you will become invincible.
- Epictetus

With manners comes insincerity.
Truth is sometimes difficult.
- Bono

What people believe prevails over the truth.
- Sophocles

In all of his bestsellers, the Divine has told the truth,
custom-tailored to the comprehension of the times.
- Ernest Holmes

I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love
will have the final word in reality.
That is why right, temporarily defeated,
is stronger than evil triumphant.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

You must accept the truth from whatever source it comes.
- Maimonides

All the religions of the world,
while they may differ in other respects,
unitedly proclaim that nothing lives in this world but Truth.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

In wartime, truth is so precious that she
should always be attended by a bodyguard of lies.
- Winston Churchill


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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