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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Quotes about Trek

The claim "I was only following orders" has been used
to justify too many tragedies in our history.
- Captain Picard of the television series
STAR TREK: The Next Generation

Random chance seems to have operated in our favor ...
there was no deity involved.
- Spock character in the Star Trek television series

Interesting.
You Earth people glorify organized violence for 40 centuries,
but you imprison those who employ it privately.
- the character Spock in the television series Star Trek

In critical moments men sometimes see
exactly what they wish to see.
- the character Spock of the television series Star Trek

Martyrs cannot be silenced.
- the television show Star Trek: The Next Generation

Humans make illogical decisions.
- Spock (character in Star Trek movies and TV shows)

Humans do have an amazing capacity
for believing what they choose,
and excluding that which is painful.
- Spock (character in Star Trek television series)

Where there is no emotion,
there is no motive for violence.
- the character Spock in the Star Trek television series

Friendship must dare to risk, or it's not friendship.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard in the TV show Star Trek: The Next Generation

What you want is irrelevant,
what you have chosen is at hand.
- Spock character in Star Trek VI movie

To deny the facts would be illogical.
- the character Spock in the television series Star Trek

Change is the essential process of all existence.
- Spock character in Star Trek

Things are only impossible until they're not.
- Jean-Luc Picard, character in STAR TREK: The Next Generation

There are times, sir, when men of good conscience
cannot blindly follow orders.
- Captain Picard, STAR TREK: The Next Generation

Love does not claim possession, but gives freedom.
- Rabindranath Tagore

We must be free not because we claim freedom,
but because we practice it.
- William Faulkner

I claim to be a simple individual liable
to err like any other fellow mortal.
I own, however, that I have humility enough
to confess my errors and to retrace my steps.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

I claim that human mind or human society
is not divided into watertight compartments
called social, political and religious.
All act and react upon one another.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

We are born at a given moment, in a given place and,
like vintage years of wine, we have the qualities of the year
and of the season of which we are born.
Astrology does not lay claim to anything more.
- Carl Jung

The first sigh of love is the last breath of wisdom.
- Anonymous

Love is an irresistible desire
to be irresistibly desired.
- Robert Frost

Love conquers all things except poverty and a toothache.
- Mae West

Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another.
- H. L. Mencken

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
- H. L. Mencken

Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.
- H. L. Mencken

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter
quite like unrequited love.
- Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts comic

Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein

Love is like an hourglass,
with the heart filling up as the brain empties.
- Jules Renard

Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde

True love is like ghosts,
which everyone talks about and few have seen.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld

The Wedding March always reminds me of the music
played when soldiers go into battle.
- Heinrich Heine

Save a boyfriend for a rainy day -
and another, in case it doesn't rain.
- Mae West

A woman in love can't be reasonable -
or she probably wouldn't be in love.
- Mae West

Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein

True love comes quietly,
without banners or flashing lights.
If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
- Erich Segal

Love is a grave mental disease.
- Plato

Oh, come on, Shrek, wake up and smell the pheromones!
- the movie Shrek (2001)

The only true love is love at first sight;
second sight dispels it.
- Israel Zangwill

A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous

When you are courting a nice girl
an hour seems like a second.
When you sit on a red-hot cinder
a second seems like an hour.
That's relativity.
- Albert Einstein

Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation.
- Khalil Gibran

Love is what makes two people
sit in the middle of a park bench
when there is plenty of room at both ends.
- Anonymous

The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson

Love looks through a telescope;
envy, through a microscope.
- Josh Billings

One's first love is always perfect
until one meets one's second love.
- Elizabeth Aston

I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner

A relationship, I think, is like a shark.
You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall (1977)

I'd like to kiss ya, but I just washed ma hair.
- the movie The Cabin in the Cotton

My wife ran off with my best friend, and I sure do miss him.
- Anonymous

Love is loving what your lover loves.
- Anonymous

Love is only a dirty trick played on us
to achieve continuation of the species.
- W. Somerset Maugham

My boyfriend and I broke up.
He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
- Rita Rudner

Love is metaphysical gravity.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

Love thy neighbor -
and if he happens to be tall,
debonair and devastating,
it will be that much easier.
- Mae West

If love is the answer,
could you please rephrase the question.
- Lily Tomlin

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain

Love is when the other person's happiness
is more important than your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

Life is a reflection of intent.
Love reflects love.
Hate reflects hate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A big part of letting go is recognizing
when it is time to stay in a situation
and when it is time to move on.
- Darren L. Johnson

Look your best - who said love is blind?
- Mae West

You may call God love, you may call God goodness.
But the best name for God is compassion.
- Meister Eckhart

Lord, grant that I might not so much
seek to be loved as to love.
- St. Francis of Assisi

Use the power of your word
in the direction of truth and love.
- don Miguel Ruiz

Where There is Love,
Nothing is Missing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

True love is a process of co-creation
in which neither feels ownership or superiority.
Jealousy is a highly destructive force
for love and relationships.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Where there is great love,
there are always miracles.
- Willa Cather

Do you feel stuck?
Whether in a project, a job, a relationship,
or some other situation,
there is a time for perseverance,
and a time for letting go and moving on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

New Yorkers love it when you spill your guts out there.
Spill your guts at Wimbledon and they make you stop and clean it up.
- Jimmy Carter

He who marries for love without money
has good nights and sorry days.
- Anonymous


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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