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Funny Quotes about Swap

I have friends in overalls
whose friendship I would not swap
for the favor of the kings of the world.
- Thomas A. Edison

When your friends begin to flatter
you on how young you look,
it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain

Nothing makes the earth seem so spacious
as to have friends at a distance;
they make the latitudes and the longitudes.
- Henry David Thoreau

Everyone should have at least two friends -
one to talk to and one to talk about.
- Anonymous

I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell -
you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain

A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler

Nothing is more cheerful than talking
about our friends' shortcomings.
- Mason Cooley

I have lost friends, some by death ...
others by sheer inability to cross the street.
- Virginia Woolf

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin

Am I not destroying my enemies
when I make friends of them?
- Abraham Lincoln

An excellent man;
he has no enemies;
and none of his friends like him.
- Oscar Wilde

We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton

Most people enjoy the inferiority of their best friends.
- Lord Chesterfield

Heaven must be an awfully dull place
if your best friends end up elsewhere.
- Anonymous

To go against the dominant thinking of your friends,
of most of the people you see every day,
is perhaps the most difficult act of heroism you can perform.
- Theodore H. White

He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
- Oscar Wilde

Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov

A benevolent man should allow a few faults in himself,
to keep his friends in countenance.
- Benjamin Franklin

"Appeasement" is the policy of feeding your friends to a crocodile,
one at a time, in hopes that the crocodile will eat you last.
- Franklin D. Roosevelt

Money can't buy friends
but it can get you a better class of enemy.
- Spike Milligan

I choose my friends for their good looks,
my acquaintances for their good characters,
and my enemies for their intellects.
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde

Tell me about a person's family, friends, and community,
and I'll tell you what his opinions are.
- Mark Twain
(paraphrase)

Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.
- the movie The Godfather, Part II

It is the friends you can call up at 4 A.M. that matter.
- Marlene Dietrich

Best Friends: we're a parade - even by ourselves!
- Mary Anne Radmacher

You can make more friends in two months
by becoming interested in other people
than you can in two years by trying
to get other people interested in you.
- Dale Carnegie

Your greatest gift to your family and friends is yourself -
your relaxed, happy, and fully-present self.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Farewell My Friend
It was beautiful as long as it lasted
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care...
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
At every turning of my life
I came across good friends,
Friends who stood by me,
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad do think of me
for that's what I'll like
when you live in the hearts
of those you love, remember then
you never die.
- Gitanjali Ghei

Our opportunity is to Soar our Spirit.
To see Light and Joy in everything.
To spread our wings and fly boldly.
To give thanks for rainbows and butterflies -
our symbols of renewal and rebirth.
To offer daily Thanksgiving - for ourselves, our family,
our friends, our community, for the whole world.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Fear makes strangers of people
who would otherwise be friends.
- Shirley MacLaine

We'll be friends until forever, just you wait and see.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Do not save your loving speeches
For your friends till they are dead;
Do not write them on their tombstones,
Speak them rather now instead.
- Anna Cummins

Live with intention.
Walk to the edge.
Listen hard.
Practice wellness.
Play with abandon.
Laugh.
Choose with no regret.
Appreciate your friends.
Continue to learn.
Do what you love.
Live as if this is all there is.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Those that want friends to open themselves unto
are cannibals of their own hearts.
- Francis Bacon

But what a cruel thing is war
to separate and destroy families and friends.
- Robert E. Lee

In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies,
but the silence of our friends.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

I have lost my seven best friends,
which is to say that God has had mercy on me
seven times without realizing it.
He lent a friendship, took it from me, and sent me another.
- Jean Cocteau

I have three kinds of friends:
those who love me,
those who pay no attention to me,
and those who detest me.
- Nicolas De Chamfort

Friends share our pain and touch our wounds
with a gentle and tender hand.
- Henri Nouwen

The best way to keep your friends
is not to give them away.
- Wilson Mizner

True friends are appreciative and never demanding.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I destroy my enemies when I make them my friends.
- Abraham Lincoln

Be careful the friends you choose -
for you will become like them.
- W. Clement Stone

We will remember not the words of our enemies,
but the silence of our friends.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

I make friends with my fear. I am unstoppable.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Can miles truly separate us from friends?
If we want to be with someone we love, aren't we already there?
- Richard Bach

Everyone hears what you say.
Friends listen to what you say.
Best friends listen to what you don't say.
- Anonymous

I get by with a little help from my friends.
- John Lennon

Could we see when and where we are to meet again,
we would be more tender when we bid our friends goodbye.
- Ouida

Life is partly what we make it,
and partly what it is made by the friends we choose.
- Tehyi Hsieh

Friends are God's apology for relations.
- Hugh Kingsmille

Books and friends should be few but good.
- Anonymous

Choose your friends carefully.
Your enemies will choose you.
- Yasser Arafat

No man is the whole of himself;
his friends are the rest of him.
- Harry Emerson Fosdick

Sometimes new love comes between old friends.
Sometimes the best love was the one that was always there.
- Anonymous

My father always used to say that when you die,
if you've got five real friends, then you've had a great life.
- Lee Iacocca

Lighten up! Slow down the shopping.
Your greatest gift to your family and friends is yourself -
your relaxed, happy, and fully-present self.
Consider gifting hand-made cards with messages
of true appreciation in place of store-bought presents.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Good friends are like stars ...
you don't always see them,
but you know they are always there.
- Anonymous

A man's growth is seen in the successive choirs of his friends.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Friends are God's way of apologizing to us for our families.
- Anonymous

When true friends meet in adverse hour,
'Tis like a sunbeam through a shower.
A watery way an instant seen,
The darkly closing clouds between.
- Sir Walter Scott

Do not trouble yourself much
to get new things, whether clothes or friends...
Sell your clothes and keep your thoughts.
- Henry David Thoreau

Friends are born, not made.
- Henry Adams

Friends are like bras:
close to your heart and there for support.
- Anonymous

The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that
they can grow separately without growing apart.
- Elisabeth Foley

Fate makes us family. choice makes us friends.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Humility must always be the portion of any man
who receives acclaim earned in the blood of his followers
and the sacrifices of his friends.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

It is only the great-hearted who can be true friends.
The mean and cowardly can never know what true friendship means.
- Charles Kingsley

I always like to know everything about my new friends,
and nothing about my old ones.
- Oscar Wilde

Fate chooses your relations, you choose your friends.
- Jacques Delille

I awoke this morning with devout thanksgiving
for my friends, the old and the new.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.