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Funny Quotes about Rude

A person who is nice to you,
but rude to the waiter,
is not a nice person.
- Dave Barry

The Eye-of-the-Storm.
Surrounded by the winds and the rain,
yet peaceful in its own unworldly way -
an unnatural ruddy-cloudy misty-bright kind of way.
Whatever comes next, the eye of the storm is
a moment of serenity among the challenge -
a time for repose and contemplation.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

He who loves practice without theory
is like the sailor who boards ship
without a rudder and compass
and never knows where he may cast.
- Leonardo da Vinci

Everybody loves you when you're six foot in the ground.
- John Lennon

Love is loving what your lover loves.
- Anonymous

Stay hopeless and confused. Keep polishing those skills.
- the movie When a Man Loves a Woman (1994)

He who loves 50 people has 50 woes;
he who loves no one has no woes.
- The Buddha

God Loves an Open Mind, Clean Hands, and a Loving Heart.
So does Your Mother.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A friend is someone who knows all about you,
and loves you just the same.
- Elbert Hubbard

The one who loves the least, controls the relationship.
- Robert Anthony

Jealousy is that pain which a man feels
from the apprehension that he is not equally beloved
by the person whom he entirely loves.
- Joseph Addison

Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man
... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do
every minute of every day. And the invisible man
has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do.
And if you do any of these things,
he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire
and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever,
and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream,
until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you.
He loves you and he needs money.
- George Carlin

If misery loves company, misery has company enough.
- Henry David Thoreau

The creation of something new
is not accomplished by the intellect
but by the play instinct acting from inner necessity.
The creative mind plays with the objects it loves.
- Carl Jung

A friend is one who knows us, but loves us anyway.
- Jerome Cummings

He who wants to do good knocks at the gate:
he who loves finds the door open.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Whoever loves instruction loves knowledge,
but he who hates correction is stupid.
- Anonymous

Love the heart that hurts you,
but never hurt the heart that loves you.
- Vipin Sharma

Absence diminishes small loves and increases great ones,
as the wind blows out the candle and blows up the bonfire.
- Francois de la Rochefoucauld

The soul loves to meditate,
for in contact with the Spirit lies its greatest joy.
If, then you experience mental resistance during meditation,
remember that reluctance to meditate comes from the ego;
it doesn't belong to the soul.
- Paramahansa Yogananda

A blessed thing it is for any man or woman to have a friend,
one human soul whom we can trust utterly,
who knows the best and worst of us,
and who loves us in spite of all our faults.
- Charles Kingsley

No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin

It was impossible to get a conversation going,
everybody was talking too much.
- Yogi Berra

Money won't make you happy...
but everybody wants to find out for themselves.
- Zig Ziglar

Everybody is a genius.
But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree,
it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.
- Albert Einstein

A person is smart. People are dumb,
panicky dangerous animals and you know it.
Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew
the Earth was the center of the universe.
Five hundred years ago,
everybody knew the Earth was flat,
and fifteen minutes ago,
you knew that humans were alone on this planet.
Imagine what you'll know tomorrow.
- the movie Men in Black

Never trust a man who speaks well of everybody
- John Churton Collins

Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody,
I think that is a much greater hunger,
a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.
- Mother Teresa

Everybody needs beauty as well as bread.
- John Muir

Great leaders are almost always great simplifiers,
who can cut through argument, debate, and doubt
to offer a solution everybody can understand.
- Colin Powell

You don't get harmony when everybody sings the same note.
- Doug Floyd

When you are content to be simply yourself
and don't compare or compete,
everybody will respect you.
- Lao Tzu

You know, everybody makes mistakes when they are president.
- William J. Clinton

Everybody likes a compliment.
- Abraham Lincoln

Everybody needs beauty as well as bread,
places to play in and pray in,
where nature may heal and cheer
and give strength to the body and soul.
- John Muir

Campaign behavior for wives:
Always be on time.
Do as little talking as humanly possible.
Lean back in the parade car
so everybody can see the president.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

There's a point... when you have to choose
whether to be like everybody else the rest of your life,
or to make a virtue of your peculiarities.
- Ursula K. Le Guin

That old law about "an eye for an eye" leaves everybody blind.
The time is always right to do the right thing.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

We are not going to be able
to operate our Spaceship Earth
successfully nor for much longer
unless we see it as a whole spaceship
and our fate as common.
It has to be everybody or nobody.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

From one point of view, one individual's vote
doesn't make any difference whatsoever.
The probability of an election swinging
by a single vote is infinitesimal.
On the other hand, if everybody took the attitude
that voting didn't matter, there could never
be a democratically elected government - at all.
So, does your vote matter? You bet your vote matters.
And, at least as much as your vote matters,
your intention for the future of the world matters.
That's so important, it's worth saying again.
At Least As Much As Your Vote Matters,
Your Intention For The Future Of The Entire World Matters.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You have to be an original individual;
you have to find your innermost core on your own,
with no guide, no guiding scriptures.
It is a dark night, but with the intense fire of inquiry
you are bound to come to the sunrise.
Everybody who has burned with intense inquiry
has found the sunrise.
Others only believe.
Those who believe are not religious,
they are simply avoiding the great adventure
of religion by believing.
- Osho

Music is everybody's possession.
It's only publishers who think that people own it.
- John Lennon

Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

When I eventually met Mr. Right
I had no idea that his first name was Always.
- Rita Rudner

Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.
- the movie National Lampoon's Animal House (1978)

No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective

I have no fear of the gallows ... They're going to shoot me.
- the movie Love and Death

And you just gotta remember, Sparky -
no matter what they tell you - you can NEVER have too much sugar.
- the movie Michael (1996)

Oh no, I can't do anything to the death.
Doctor's orders. You see, I have this ulcer condition,
and death is the worst thing for it.
- the movie Love and Death

One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain

A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler

No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln

Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove

Television has a real problem. They have no page two.
- Art Buchwald

A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous

Marriage has no guarantees.
If that's what you're looking for,
go live with a car battery.
- Erma Bombeck

There's no reason to become alarmed,
and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight.
By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
- the movie Airplane!

As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero,
he no longer is.
- George Carlin

You have no values. With you its all nihilism,
cynicism, sarcasm, and orgasm.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Clothes make the man.
Naked people have little or no influence on society.
- Mark Twain

Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

When all think alike, no one is thinking very much.
- Walter Lippmann

Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.
- Mark Twain

The universe we observe has precisely
the properties we should expect
if there is, at bottom, no design,
no purpose, no evil, no good,
nothing but blind, pitiless indifference.
- Charles Darwin

The worst government is often the most moral.
One composed of cynics is often very tolerant and humane.
But when fanatics are on top there is no limit to oppression.
- H. L. Mencken

Faced with the choice between changing one's mind
and proving that there is no need to do so,
almost everyone gets busy on the proof.
- John Kenneth Galbraith

It is the things for which there is no evidence
that are believed with passion.
- Bertrand Russell

No problem is so formidable that
you can't walk away from it.
- Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts

Random chance seems to have operated in our favor ...
there was no deity involved.
- Spock character in the Star Trek television series


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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