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Funny Quotes about Pen

For all sad words of tongue and pen,
The saddest are these, "It might have been.
- John Greenleaf Whittier

Some'll rob you with a six gun,
Some with a fountain pen.
- Woody Guthrie

Do you have a plan for your life?
If not, allocate some time today to sit quietly
with pen and paper to begin writing your life plan -
what you want to accomplish with your life,
and what projects will support your goals.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A penny saved is a penny earned.
- Benjamin Franklin [attributed]

The jealous are troublesome to others,
but a torment to themselves.
- William Penn

Choose a friend as thou dost a wife,
till death separate you.
- William Penn

I expect to pass through this world but once.
Any good therefore that I can do,
or any kindness that I can show to my fellow-creature,
let me do it now.
Let me not defer or neglect it,
for I shall not pass this way again.
- William Penn

He that is jealous is not in love.
- Saint Augustine

Wisdom I know is social.
She seeks her fellows.
But Beauty is jealous,
and illy bears the presence of a rival.
- Thomas Jefferson

No one can make you jealous, angry, vengeful, or greedy -
unless you let him.
- Napoleon Hill

We are composed of self-contradictions.
Each of us is loving in some moments - hateful in others.
Patient and calm sometimes - harried by urgency at others.
Understanding - and self-absorbed.
Reassuring - and sarcastic.
Generous - and greedy.
Trusting - and jealous.
Comforting - and snappish.
Original - and stuck in a rut.
Thankful - and needy.
Forgiving - and vengeful.
Nurturing ourself - and stuffing ourself with fast food.
Honoring our bodies - and overstressing.
Being Joyful - and Suffering.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God,
visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children
to the third and fourth generations.
- Exodus 20:5

A loving relationship is one in which
the loved one is free to be himself -
to laugh with me, but never at me;
to cry with me, but never because of me;
to love life, to love himself,
to love being loved.
Such a relationship is based upon freedom
and can never grow in a jealous heart.
- Leo F. Buscaglia

"Mother Teresa Prayer"
People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered;
... Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you
of selfish, ulterior motives;
... Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some
false friends and some true enemies;
... Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
... Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
... Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
... Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
... Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;
... Give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway.
We can do no great things - only small things with great love.
- although commonly attributed to Mother Teresa,
who kept a copy of this prayer on
the wall of her Calcutta orphanage,
this prayer was actually written by Kent Keith.

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand

"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It's not the size of the dog in the fight,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain

Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer

If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death

Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove

I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln

Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein

Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)

I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer

Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek

Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein

Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire

Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
- Will Rogers

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
- Anonymous

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain

Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West

One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill

The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)

If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
- Anonymous

Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

Am I not destroying my enemies
when I make friends of them?
- Abraham Lincoln

The trouble with the world is not
that people know too little,
but that they know so many things that ain't so.
- Mark Twain

Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation.
- Khalil Gibran

It is only the poor who pay cash,
and that not from virtue,
but because they are refused credit.
- Anatole France

Do not laugh much or often or unrestrainedly.
- Epictetus

Politics is such a torment that I advise everyone
I love not to mix with it.
- Thomas Jefferson

The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain

Do not bite at the bait of pleasure,
till you know there is no hook beneath it.
- Thomas Jefferson

I think that there is nothing, not even crime,
more opposed to poetry, to philosophy, ay, to life itself
than this incessant business.
- Henry David Thoreau

Although personally I am quite content with existing explosives,
I feel we must not stand in the path of improvement.
- Winston Churchill

If you ask me anything I don't know,
I'm not going to answer.
- Yogi Berra

Though I am a servant, I am not your servant.
- Ursula K. Le Guin

Belief is not the beginning but the end of all knowledge.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition,
is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit you could possibly have.
- Dale Carnegie

Silence is not always a Sign of Wisdom,
but Babbling is ever a folly.
- Benjamin Franklin

The faith that stands on authority is not faith.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Too often the strong, silent man is silent only because
he does not know what to say, and is reputed strong
only because he has remained silent.
- Winston Churchill

I once had a rose named after me
and I was very flattered.
But I was not pleased to read
the description in the catalogue:
no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems,
but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
- Herm Albright

The rich are not born skeptical or cynical.
They are made that way by events, circumstances.
- Paul Getty

It's not clutter, it's my unique filing system.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Delusion: belief said to be false by someone who does not share it.
- Thomas Szasz

I am not afraid of storms
for I am learning how to sail my ship.
- Louisa May Alcott

Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted.
- John Lennon

The church is always trying to get other people to reform;
it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little,
by way of example.
- Mark Twain


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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