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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Quotes about Growing Up

The trick is growing up without growing old.
- Casey Stengel

Choose to be as a young child -
fully awake, eager for the next experience.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie PHOTO

Everyone who got where he is,
had to begin where he was.
- Richard L. Evans

I can't go back to yesterday -
because I was a different person then.
- Lewis Carroll PHOTO

Born to be wild - live to outgrow it.
- Lao Tzu

Youth, large, lusty, loving -
Youth, full of grace, force, fascination.
Do you know that Old Age may come after you
with equal grace, force, fascination?
- Walt Whitman

Maturity is the ability to do a job
whether or not you are supervised,
to carry money without spending it,
and to bear an injustice without wanting to get even.
- Ann Landers

If I try to be like him, who will be like me?
- Yiddish proverb

It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.
- e. e. cummings

No, they don't appreciate you - and it's not their job.
It's your own job to appreciate yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You have to do your own growing
no matter how tall your grandfather was.
- Abraham Lincoln

Intellectual growth should commence at birth
and cease only at death.
- Albert Einstein

As long as any adult thinks that he,
like the parents and teachers of old,
can become introspective,
invoking his own youth to understand
the youth before him,
he is lost.
- Margaret Mead

Love does not begin and end the way we seem to think it does.
Love is a battle, love is a war; love is a growing up.
- James A. Baldwin

The false can never grow into truth by growing in power.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Be not afraid of growing slowly,
be afraid only of standing still.
- Chinese Proverb

Our growing softness,
our increasing lack of physical fitness,
is a menace to our security.
- John F. Kennedy

The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that
they can grow separately without growing apart.
- Elisabeth Foley

One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers,
but with gratitude to those who touched our human feelings.
The curriculum is so much necessary raw material,
but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant
and for the soul of the child.
- Carl Jung

A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.
- Benjamin Franklin

To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the wedding cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it;
Whenever you're right, shut up.
- Ogden Nash

My boyfriend and I broke up.
He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
- Rita Rudner

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world.
I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain

If you don't know where you are going,
you might wind up someplace else.
- Yogi Berra

Love is like an hourglass,
with the heart filling up as the brain empties.
- Jules Renard

You'll live to be a hundred if you give up
all the things that make you want to.
- the movie Interiors

They have come up with a perfect understanding.
He won't try to run her life,
and he won't try to run his, either.
- Anonymous

Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

After fifteen minutes I wanted to marry her,
and after half an hour
I completely gave up the idea of stealing her purse.
- the movie Take the Money and Run (1969)

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
- Phyllis Diller

It looks like we're up chocolate creek without a Popsicle stick!
- the movie Shrek 2 (2004)

Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak;
courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.
- Winston Churchill

New Yorkers love it when you spill your guts out there.
Spill your guts at Wimbledon and they make you stop and clean it up.
- Jimmy Carter

I have faith. I just need proof to back it up.
- the movie Simon Birch

Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)

Oh, come on, Shrek, wake up and smell the pheromones!
- the movie Shrek (2001)

One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain

Twinkle, twinkle little bat
How I wonder what you're at!
Up above the world you fly,
Like a tea-tray in the sky.
- Lewis Carroll

I am fond of pigs.
Dogs look up to us.
Cats look down on us.
Pigs treat us as equals.
- Winston Churchill

I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner

People who are wrapped up in themselves make small packages.
- Benjamin Franklin

The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

I always seem to get inspiration and renewed vitality
by contact with this great novel land of yours
which sticks up out of the Atlantic.
- Winston Churchill

Praying is important when you wake up
at two o'clock in the morning
feeling sick from eating something dumb the day before.
- Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts

If it keeps up, man will atrophy
all his limbs but the push-button finger.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Never stir up litigation.
A worse man can scarcely be found than one who does this.
- Abraham Lincoln

There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie

I once had a rose named after me
and I was very flattered.
But I was not pleased to read
the description in the catalogue:
no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

I was wise enough to never grow up
while fooling most people into believing I had.
- Margaret Mead

Ending a sentence with a preposition is
something up with which I will not put.
- Winston Churchill

Oh, you weak, beautiful people
who give up with such grace.
What you need is someone to take hold of you -
gently, with love, and hand your life back to you.
- Tennessee Williams

Creationists make it sound as though a "theory'
is something you dreamt up after being drunk all night.
- Isaac Asimov

I always arrive late at the office,
but I make up for it by leaving early.
- Charles Lamb

I was so jazzed about sobering up
and starting a new life;
I had to stop at a bar
to get a drink just to calm down.
- the television series Glee

Heaven must be an awfully dull place
if your best friends end up elsewhere.
- Anonymous

Life is like a roller coaster - scream Whee... on the way down,
and let the momentum carry you back up the next hill.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Man will occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
- Winston Churchill

As the evening beckons with the promise of tomorrow...
may your gratitude rise up and with strength answer, "yes."
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Few things are harder to put up with
than the annoyance of a good example.
- Mark Twain

This being grown up isn't all it's cracked up to be.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If at first you don't succeed,
try, try, and try again.
Then give up.
There's no use being a damned fool about it.
- W. C. Fields

Mothers all want their sons to grow up to be president,
but they don't want them to become politicians in the process.
- John F. Kennedy

Lighten up, have a rainbows and butterflies kind of day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I don't advise a haircut, man.
All hairdressers are in the employment of the government.
Hairs are your aerials.
They pick up signals from the cosmos,
and transmit them directly into the brain.
This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.
- the movie Withnail & I

Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations.
I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty,
believe in them, and try to follow where they lead.
- Louisa May Alcott

I know that God made the whole world in 4004 BC.
I know because my preacher told me. He's a good man.
He's even saving up all the money we give him
to go to bible college someday.
- Anonymous Humor

You have enemies? Good.
That means you've stood up for something,
sometime in your life.
- Winston Churchill

Sometimes I wonder if we shall ever grow up
in our politics and say definite things which mean something,
or whether we shall always go on using generalities
to which everyone can subscribe, and which mean very little.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

If it's Right, stand up for it - together.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is the friends you can call up at 4 A.M. that matter.
- Marlene Dietrich

One of the annoying things about believing in free will
and individual responsibility is the difficulty
of finding somebody to blame your problems on.
And when you do find somebody, it's remarkable
how often his picture turns up on your driver's license.
- P. J. O'Rourke


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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