Funny Quotes about Correlation

"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It's not the size of the dog in the fight,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West

Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein

Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek

The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
- Will Rogers

Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire

Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove

I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln

I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein

Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)

DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)

I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

One does not discover new lands without consenting
to lose sight of the shore for a very long time.
- Andre Gide

Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

One minute you're in the lunchroom at Glenwood High
and you ... blink and you're 40,
you blink again and you can see movies
at half price on a senior citizen's pass.
Ask not for whom the bell tolls, or to put it more accurately,
ask not for whom the toilet flushes.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity

I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man,
and I hate people like that!
- Tom Lehrer

Ending a sentence with a preposition is
something up with which I will not put.
- Winston Churchill

Belief is not the beginning but the end of all knowledge.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Too often the strong, silent man is silent only because
he does not know what to say, and is reputed strong
only because he has remained silent.
- Winston Churchill

I am not afraid of storms
for I am learning how to sail my ship.
- Louisa May Alcott

Delusion: belief said to be false by someone who does not share it.
- Thomas Szasz

I do not believe that civilization will be wiped out
in a war fought with the atomic bomb.
Perhaps two-thirds of the people of the earth will be killed.
- Albert Einstein

Morality which depends upon the helplessness
of a man or woman has not much to recommend it.
Morality is rooted in the purity of our hearts.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

I am always ready to learn
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

The man who does not read good books
has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain

The lawyer's truth is not Truth,
but consistency or a consistent expediency.
- Henry David Thoreau

Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation.
- Khalil Gibran

The objection to Puritans is not that
they try to make us think as they do,
but that they try to make us do as they think.
- H. L. Mencken

Do not bite at the bait of pleasure,
till you know there is no hook beneath it.
- Thomas Jefferson

There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie

The trouble with the world is not
that people know too little,
but that they know so many things that ain't so.
- Mark Twain

It's not a mess.
It's a physical manifestation of
a wonderfully complex ability to
assess and compartmentalize information.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

The only advantage of not being too good a housekeeper
is that your guests are so pleased
to feel how very much better they are.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

There is no pleasure in having nothing to do;
the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.
- Mary Wilson Little

It's not much of a tail, but I'm sort of attached to it.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

The existence of an anthropomorphic
"Father-figure" deity is not impossible,
merely exceptionally improbable and illogical.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Genius may have its limitations,
but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
- Elbert Hubbard

The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our Light, not our Darkness, that most frightens us.
- Marianne Williamson

The church is always trying to get other people to reform;
it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little,
by way of example.
- Mark Twain

People who say it cannot be done should not
interrupt those who are doing it.
- George Bernard Shaw

Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein

Do not speak to me of rules.
This is war! This is not a game of cricket!
- from the movie The Bridge On The River Kwai

A loyal friend laughs at your jokes
when they're not so good,
and sympathizes with your problems
when they're not so bad.
- Arnold H. Glasgow

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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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