If you want reality to be different than it is,
you might as well try to teach a cat to bark.
- Byron Katie
If you want something to be different than it is,
you might as well teach a cat to bark.
Wanting something to be different than it is, is hopeless.
- Byron Katie
A dog is not considered a good dog because he is a good barker.
A man is not considered a good man because he is a good talker.
- The Buddha
It's not the size of the dog in the fight,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain
I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx
You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog.
- Harry S. Truman
Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)
Fear of death ... That's funny. I have that too.
My dog has it. It's very common with living creatures.
- the movie Anything Else (2003)
How many legs does a dog have
if you call the tail a leg? Four.
Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.
- Abraham Lincoln
Some days you're the dog,
and some days you're the hydrant.
- Anonymous
Let your sympathies and your compassion
be always with the under dog in the fight -
this is magnanimity;
but bet on the other one - this is business.
- Mark Twain
Stress is always waiting
just outside your door
like a vicious wild-dog.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Make a conscious choice to live
a serene and stress-free life.
Stress is always waiting just outside your door
like a vicious wild-dog.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
What counts is not necessarily
the size of the dog in the fight -
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower quoting Mark Twain
If you call a tail a leg, how many legs has a dog?
Five? No, calling a tail a leg don't make it a leg.
- Abraham Lincoln
Every dog has his day.
- Proverb
Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand
"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer
If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)
Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek
I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer
Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove
When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain
The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death
The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
- Will Rogers
Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
- Anonymous
One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein
DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)
It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel
Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West
I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein
Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire
Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
- Anonymous
Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)
Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
- Robert A. Heinlein
The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain
People who say it cannot be done should not
interrupt those who are doing it.
- George Bernard Shaw
Faith: not wanting to know what is true.
- Friedrich Nietzsche
What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?
- Ursula K. Le Guin
I'm sure we all agree that we ought to love one another
and I know there are people in the world
that do not love their fellow human beings
and I HATE people like that.
- Tom Lehrer
I do not believe that civilization will be wiped out
in a war fought with the atomic bomb.
Perhaps two-thirds of the people of the earth will be killed.
- Albert Einstein
Do not take life too seriously.
You will never get out of it alive.
- Elbert Hubbard
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our Light, not our Darkness, that most frightens us.
- Marianne Williamson
Do not bite at the bait of pleasure,
till you know there is no hook beneath it.
- Thomas Jefferson
The wine of youth does not always
clear with advancing years;
sometimes it grows turbid.
- Carl Jung
The rich are not born skeptical or cynical.
They are made that way by events, circumstances.
- Paul Getty
I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man,
and I hate people like that!
- Tom Lehrer
There is no pleasure in having nothing to do;
the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.
- Mary Wilson Little
Silence is not always a Sign of Wisdom,
but Babbling is ever a folly.
- Benjamin Franklin
Genius may have its limitations,
but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
- Elbert Hubbard
Do not use a hatchet to remove
a fly from your friend's forehead.
- Chinese Proverb
Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted.
- John Lennon
Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition,
is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit you could possibly have.
- Dale Carnegie
Am I not destroying my enemies
when I make friends of them?
- Abraham Lincoln
When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie
Man's nature is not essentially evil.
Brute nature has been known to
yield to the influence of love.
You must never despair of human nature.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein
If Christ were here now there is one thing
he would not be - a Christian.
- Mark Twain
Do not speak to me of rules.
This is war! This is not a game of cricket!
- from the movie The Bridge On The River Kwai
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.