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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Quotes about Attending

I would rather be exposed to
the inconveniences attending too much liberty
than those attending too small a degree of it.
- Thomas Jefferson

If something is important to you,
attend to it immediately, and regularly.
If something is not really important to you,
that's great also -
just scratch it off your to-do list forever,
and never worry about it again.
Choose how you invest your time, and honor your choices.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The greatest compliment that was ever paid me
was when one asked me what I thought,
and attended to my answer.
- Henry David Thoreau

In wartime, truth is so precious that she
should always be attended by a bodyguard of lies.
- Winston Churchill

He didn't come out of my belly, but my God,
I've made his bones, because I've attended to every meal,
and how he sleeps,
and the fact that he swims like a fish
because I took him to the ocean.
I'm so proud of all those things.
But he is my biggest pride.
- John Lennon

One of the greatest pains to human nature is the pain of a new idea.
- Walter Bagehot

Credulity - willingness to accept
unsupported statements without demanding proof -
is the greatest ally of the dictator and the demagogue.
- Arthur C. Clarke

The greatest deception men suffer is from their own opinions.
- Leonardo da Vinci

Know that the greatest fear is fear of the unknown.
Seek to meet the unknown with courage and a sense of adventure.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I consider my greatest accomplishment to be lifelong celibacy.
- Isaac Newton
(discoverer of the laws of gravitation and motion,
famous mathematician, and perhaps the greatest scientist ever)

The greatest mistake you can make in life
is to be continually fearing you will make one.
- Elbert Hubbard

The greatest lovers are like twin blooms,
each reflecting the passion and the glory of the other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The greatest wealth is health.
- Virgil

Your greatest gift to your family and friends is yourself -
your relaxed, happy, and fully-present self.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Action is our greatest weapon against fear.
Left to molder, fear grows upon itself,
but in the face of action,
fear is left in the dust.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The greatest obstacle to a Joyful Life
is your "story" about your life.
Your story is filled with perceives needs and obligations.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The greatest virtue of man is perhaps curiosity.
- Anatole France

One of the greatest diseases is to be nobody to anybody.
- Mother Teresa

During the first period of a man's life
the greatest danger is not to take the risk.
- Soren Kierkegaard

Death is not the greatest loss in life.
The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live.
- Norman Cousins

The greatest weapon against stress
is our ability to choose one thought over another.
- William James

The greatest and most important problems of life
are all fundamentally insoluble.
They can never be solved but only outgrown.
- Carl Jung

Satisfaction of one's curiosity
is one of the greatest sources of happiness in life.
- Linus Pauling

The secret of making dreams come true
can be summarized in four C's.
They are Curiosity, Confidence, Courage, and Constancy;
and the greatest of these is Confidence.
- Walt Disney

To give up yourself without regret is the greatest charity.
- Bodhidharma

A thankful heart is the greatest virtue.
- Cicero

Know that the greatest gift you can give the world is your happiness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Health is the greatest possession.
Contentment is the greatest treasure.
Confidence is the greatest friend.
Non-being is the greatest joy.
- Lao Tzu

Ones best success comes after their greatest disappointments.
- Henry Ward Beecher

The greatest roadblock to a great relationship
is trying to force a partner to change through bribes or threats.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If one oversteps the bounds of moderation,
the greatest pleasures cease to please.
- Epictetus

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance -
it is the illusion of knowledge.
- Daniel J. Boorstin

Death may be the greatest of all human blessings.
- Socrates

These are not dark days: these are great days -
the greatest days our country has ever lived.
- Winston Churchill

Often, the greatest joy is to be found not in new things,
but in old things seen through new eyes.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The greatest harm can result from the best intentions.
- Terry Goodkind

It all depends on how we look at things,
and not on how things are in themselves.
The least of things with a meaning
is worth more in life than the greatest of things without it.
- Carl Jung

Let today be the day that you choose
to become your own greatest Hero.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

One of the greatest casualties
of the war in Vietnam is the Great Society...
shot down on the battlefield of Vietnam.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

The least of things with a meaning is worth more in life
than the greatest of things without it.
- Carl Jung

The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling,
but in rising every time we fall.
- Nelson Mandela

Books are the greatest gift one person can give another.
- Bono

The greatest test of courage on earth
is to bear defeat without losing heart.
- Robert Ingersoll

Your greatest gift to others is to be happy
and to radiate your happiness to the entire world.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The greatest hazard of all, losing one's self,
can occur very quietly in the world, as if it were nothing at all.
- Soren Kierkegaard

My greatest Power and my greatest Inner Peace come
when I Intend my future, and when I avoid Expecting it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.
- Mark Twain

I pray that my greatest desires will always be for
exactly what Spirit is offering me at that very moment.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The grand aim of all science is to cover
the greatest number of empirical facts
by logical deduction from
the smallest number of hypotheses or axioms.
- Albert Einstein

The greatest gift is a portion of thyself.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The greatest way to live with honor in this world
is to be what we pretend to be.
- Socrates

Be Your Own Personal Greatest Hero.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Anxiety is love's greatest killer.
It makes one feel as you might
when a drowning man holds unto you.
You want to save him, but you know
he will strangle you with his panic.
- Anais Nin

My greatest service to others is living happily,
and radiating happiness and joy to those around me.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The greatest discovery of any generation
is that a human being
can alter his life by
altering his attitude
- William James

Toleration is the greatest gift of the mind;
it requires the same effort of the brain
that it takes to balance oneself on a bicycle.
- Helen Keller

I have just three things to teach:
simplicity, patience, compassion.
These three are your greatest treasures.
- Lao Tzu

Misunderstanding arising from ignorance breeds fear,
and fear remains the greatest enemy of peace.
- Lester B. Pearson

Lighten up! Slow down the shopping.
Your greatest gift to your family and friends is yourself -
your relaxed, happy, and fully-present self.
Consider gifting hand-made cards with messages
of true appreciation in place of store-bought presents.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The greatest wealth is to live content with little.
- Plato

Our greatest glory is not in never falling,
but in rising every time we fall.
- Confucius

Non-violence is the greatest force at the disposal of mankind.
It is mightier than the mightiest weapon of destruction
devised by the ingenuity of man.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

You will never do anything in this world without courage.
It is the greatest quality of the mind next to honor.
- James Allen

Books! I dunno if I ever told you this,
but books are the greatest gift one person can give another.
- Bono

One of the greatest cause of unhappiness -
perhaps even the only cause of unhappiness - is comparison.
I remember as a young child hearing my mother say,
"Comparisons are odious."
That is one of the oldest sayings in the English language,
and one of the most important.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Only when life is difficult,
are we challenged to become our greatest selves.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Our greatest weakness lies in giving up.
The most certain way to succeed
is always to try just one more time.
- Thomas A. Edison

I abhor war and view it as the greatest scourge of mankind.
- Thomas Jefferson

An association of men who will not quarrel with one another
is a thing which has never yet existed,
from the greatest confederacy of nations
down to a town meeting or a vestry.
- Thomas Jefferson

It is of the small joys and little pleasures
that the greatest of our days are built.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

In all our contacts, it is probably the sense
of being really needed and wanted
which gives us the greatest satisfaction
and creates the most lasting bond.
- Eleanor Roosevelt


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.