It does not do to dwell on dreams, ...
and forget to live.
- the movie Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
What exactly is the function of a rubber duck?
- the movie Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002) 
Don't expect me to get excited over
another damn thing we need to find.
- Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 (2010)
The world's mental.
- the movie Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
Fasten your safety belts, clench your buttocks!
It's going be a bumpy ride!
- the movie Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004)
Now, if you don't mind, I'd appreciate it if you could lower your wand.
- the movie Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
Times like these, dark times,
they do funny things to people.
They can tear them apart.
- the movie Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (2009)
Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand
It's not the size of the dog in the fight,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain
"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer
If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)
Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove
Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill
I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)
Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein
Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)
When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein
Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
- Robert A. Heinlein
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
- Will Rogers
If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
- Anonymous
Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire
One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill
Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek
Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein
I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West
It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel
I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln
The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
- Anonymous
The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Life is never fair, and perhaps it is a good thing
for most of us that it is not.
- Oscar Wilde
Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted.
- John Lennon
I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man,
and I hate people like that!
- Tom Lehrer
Normal is not something to aspire to,
it's something to get away from.
- Jodie Foster
The church is always trying to get other people to reform;
it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little,
by way of example.
- Mark Twain
One minute you're in the lunchroom at Glenwood High
and you ... blink and you're 40,
you blink again and you can see movies
at half price on a senior citizen's pass.
Ask not for whom the bell tolls, or to put it more accurately,
ask not for whom the toilet flushes.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity
The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain
The only advantage of not being too good a housekeeper
is that your guests are so pleased
to feel how very much better they are.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
I think that there is nothing, not even crime,
more opposed to poetry, to philosophy, ay, to life itself
than this incessant business.
- Henry David Thoreau
I do not fear death.
I had been dead for billions and billions
of years before I was born,
and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.
- Mark Twain
If you ask me anything I don't know,
I'm not going to answer.
- Yogi Berra
The mind is not a vessel to be filled
but a fire to be kindled.
- Plutarch
Do not take life too seriously.
You will never get out of it alive.
- Elbert Hubbard
One does not discover new lands without consenting
to lose sight of the shore for a very long time.
- Andre Gide
The trouble with the world is not
that people know too little,
but that they know so many things that ain't so.
- Mark Twain
It is only the poor who pay cash,
and that not from virtue,
but because they are refused credit.
- Anatole France
When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie
Am I not destroying my enemies
when I make friends of them?
- Abraham Lincoln
There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie
I'm sure we all agree that we ought to love one another
and I know there are people in the world
that do not love their fellow human beings
and I HATE people like that.
- Tom Lehrer
The man who does not read good books
has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain
My advice to you is get married:
if you find a good wife you'll be happy;
if not, you'll become a philosopher.
- Socrates
Belief is not the beginning but the end of all knowledge.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
As far as the laws of mathematics
refer to reality, they are not certain,
and as far as they are certain,
they do not refer to reality.
- Albert Einstein
I do not believe that civilization will be wiped out
in a war fought with the atomic bomb.
Perhaps two-thirds of the people of the earth will be killed.
- Albert Einstein
For those who do not think,
it is best at least to rearrange
their prejudices once in a while.
- Luther Burbank
I do not believe in using women in combat,
because females are too fierce.
- Margaret Mead
It's not very heroic to slay dragons.
Dragons are generally very peaceful and well behaved.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?
- Ursula K. Le Guin
If you can not answer a man's argument,
all is not lost; you can still call him vile names.
- Elbert Hubbard
The objection to Puritans is not that
they try to make us think as they do,
but that they try to make us do as they think.
- H. L. Mencken
Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov
Please sign up on the form below to receive
my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email.
You can also search my large collection of Funny Quotes.
May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.