A divorce is like an amputation:
you survive it, but there's less of you.
- Margaret Atwood
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
- Groucho Marx
When two people decide to get a divorce,
it isn't a sign that they "don't understand" one another,
but a sign that they have, at last, begun to.
- Helen Rowland
There are four stages in a marriage.
First there's the affair,
then the marriage,
then children
and finally the fourth stage,
without which you cannot know a woman, the divorce.
- Norman Mailer
Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.
- Anonymous
If you have been divorced, you know it hurts -
especially if your marriage had lasted many years.
Whatever the circumstances of your relationship,
and whatever the nature of its ending,
there is always grief and regret -
perhaps regret over the ending,
or perhaps regret over not ending the relationship sooner -
or perhaps both.
Nonetheless, move past the grief and regret.
No matter how painful, divorce, like all endings,
opens the door to new beginnings.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You can learn how to let go of the past.
Whether you have experienced a break up
with someone you cared for deeply,
whether death has taken a loved one,
whether you have had a feud with a friend or family member,
whether you have lost a job.
Move on and let go.
Life can be joyful and rewarding again.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You cannot divorce religious belief and public service.
I've never detected any conflict between
God's will and my political duty.
If you violate one, you violate the other.
- Jimmy Carter
Do real life people actually fall in love
with the idea of being in love?
Unfortunately, it is actually quite common.
Someone wants desperately to have
the husband or wife of their dreams.
They visualize the vine-covered cottage
with the white picket fence.
They choose the colors for the nursery.
They design all the aspects of their married life.
A real person stands no chance of measuring up to those fantasies.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz
Yesterday is like a dung heap;
you can complain about the smell,
or you can use it to fertilize tomorrow's garden.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I'd like to kiss ya, but I just washed ma hair.
- the movie The Cabin in the Cotton
One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain
A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler
Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
I think you're the opposite of a paranoid.
I think you go around with the insane delusion that people like you.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell -
you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer
It looks like we're up chocolate creek without a Popsicle stick!
- the movie Shrek 2 (2004)
It's cookies, he smells like cookies,
and the smell gets stronger when he's in heat.
- the movie Michael
Husbands should be like Kleenex:
soft, strong, and disposable.
- the movie Clue (1985)
Love is like an hourglass,
with the heart filling up as the brain empties.
- Jules Renard
A relationship, I think, is like a shark.
You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall (1977)
Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes
in the hope of pulling out an eel.
- Leonardo da Vinci
Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.
- H. L. Mencken
Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek
When you are courting a nice girl
an hour seems like a second.
When you sit on a red-hot cinder
a second seems like an hour.
That's relativity.
- Albert Einstein
Nothing echoes like an empty mailbox.
- Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts
Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter
quite like unrequited love.
- Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts comic
Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde
A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous
Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill
If I had known what it would be like to have it all -
I might have been willing to settle for less.
- Lily Tomlin
Bureaucrats: they are dead at 30 and buried at 60.
They are like custard pies; you can't nail them to a wall.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Being a leader is like being a lady,
if you have to go around telling people you are one, you aren't.
- Margaret Thatcher
There is so much that must be done
in a civilized barbarism like war.
- Amelia Earhart
It's so sweet, I feel like my teeth
are rotting when I listen to the radio.
- Bono
The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson
Twinkle, twinkle little bat
How I wonder what you're at!
Up above the world you fly,
Like a tea-tray in the sky.
- Lewis Carroll
Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days.
- Benjamin Franklin
Advice is seldom welcome,
and those who need it the most, like it the least.
- Lord Chesterfield
True love is like ghosts,
which everyone talks about and few have seen.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
Politics is like football; if you see daylight, go through the hole.
- John F. Kennedy
A wedding is just like a funeral
except that you get to smell your own flowers.
- Grace Hansen
Chanting OM is sort of like MOOing backward.
- Anonymous
Self confident independent thinker -
sounds like the makings of a hero.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
When life is like a slippery downhill slope,
go skiing and scream Whee... all the way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Too many people spend money they haven't earned,
to buy things they don't want,
to impress people they don't like.
- Will Rogers
Life is like a sewer...
what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.
- Tom Lehrer
I don't like to think of laws
as rules you have to follow,
but more as suggestions.
- George Carlin
Man is a clever animal who behaves like an imbecile.
- Albert Schweitzer
Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water.
After you get used to it, it ain't so hot.
- Minnie Pearl
Marriage is an adventure, like going to war.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton
Families are like fudge... mostly sweet with a few nuts.
- Anonymous
I am always ready to learn
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill
An excellent man;
he has no enemies;
and none of his friends like him.
- Oscar Wilde
His answer trickled through my head like water through a sieve.
- Lewis Carroll
Things have never been more like the way they are today in history.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
It's like deja-vu, all over again.
- Yogi Berra
I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man,
and I hate people like that!
- Tom Lehrer
I have spent many years of my life in opposition,
and I rather like the role.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Life is like a roller coaster - scream Whee... on the way down,
and let the momentum carry you back up the next hill.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Gods always behave like the people who make them.
- Zora Neale Hurston
Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
- Groucho Marx
I like a man who grins when he fights.
- Winston Churchill
Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov
Procrastination is like a credit card:
it's a lot of fun until you get the bill.
- Christopher Parker
Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute and it
seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour
and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.
- Albert Einstein
When I hear a man preach,
I like to see him act as if he were fighting bees.
- Abraham Lincoln
A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
- Steve Martin
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.