In a bad marriage, friends are the invisible glue.
If we have enough friends, we may go on for years,
intending to leave, talking about leaving -
instead of actually getting up and leaving.
- Erica Jong
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer
but wish we didn't.
- Erica Jong 
Gossip is the opiate of the oppressed.
- Erica Jong
We are finally driven to monogamy
not by morality but by exhaustion.
- Erica Jong
He who can take advice is sometimes superior
to him who can give it.
- Erica Jong
Jealousy is all the fun you think they had.
- Erica Jong
Take your life in your own hands, and what happens?
A terrible thing: no one to blame.
- Erica Jong
I have accepted fear as a part of life -
specifically the fear of change...
I have gone ahead despite the pounding
in the heart that says: turn back.
- Erica Jong
Hate generalizes; love is particular.
- Erica Jong
Solitude is considered un-American.
- Erica Jong
Betrayal betrays the betrayer.
- Erica Jong
Driving me away is easier than saying goodbye.
- Erica Jong
If you don't risk anything, you risk even more.
- Erica Jong
The trouble is,
if you don't risk anything,
you risk even more.
- Erica Jong
Because I loved myself, I was loved.
- Erica Jong
Men have always detested women's gossip
because they suspect the truth:
their measurements are being taken and compared.
- Erica Jong
The trick is not how much pain you feel -
but how much joy you feel
- Erica Jong
No one ever found wisdom without also being a fool.
Writers, alas, have to be fools in public,
while the rest of the human race can cover its tracks.
- Erica Jong
Friends love misery, in fact.
Sometimes, especially if we are too lucky
or too successful or too pretty,
our misery is the only thing that endears us to our friends.
- Erica Jong
The best slave does not need to be beaten. She beats herself.
- Erica Jong
My reaction to porno films is as follows; After the first ten minutes,
I want to go home and screw; After the first twenty minutes,
I never want to screw again as long as I live
- Erica Jong
If sex and creativity are often
seen by dictators as subversive activities,
it's because they lead to the knowledge
that you own your own body
(and with it your own voice), and that's
the most revolutionary insight of all.
- Erica Jong
Love is serene and calm
- Erica Jong
Love gives without taking
- Erica Jong
Procrastination is the bad habit of putting off
until the day after tomorrow what should
have been done the day before yesterday.
- Napoleon Hill
Oh, Shrek. Don't worry.
Things just seem bad because it's dark and rainy
and Fiona's father hired a sleazy hitman to whack you.
- the movie Shrek 2
God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is,
he's stuck with so many bad actors
who don't know how to play funny.
- Garrison Keillor
Greetings, cosmic children of the universe.
Welcome to my serenity circle.
Please leave all bad vibes outside the healing vortex.
- the movie Shrek the Third (2007)
Too bad all the people who know how to run this country
are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair.
- George Burns
The third certainty of life, after death and taxes,
is that nothing will work out the way you want.
Life is fully as bad as you think it is.
Choose to live joyfully anyway.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A loyal friend laughs at your jokes
when they're not so good,
and sympathizes with your problems
when they're not so bad.
- Arnold H. Glasgow
The church is always trying to get other people to reform;
it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little,
by way of example.
- Mark Twain
It is far better to be alone,
than to be in bad company.
- George Washington
Man is a credulous animal, and must believe something;
in the absence of good grounds for belief,
he will be satisfied with bad ones.
- Bertrand Russell
Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory.
- Albert Schweitzer
I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner
Bad taste is simply saying the truth before it should be said.
- Mel Brooks
99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
- Anonymous
Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.
- Woody Allen
By all means marry.
If you get a good wife, you'll be happy.
If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher
and that is a good thing for any man.
- Socrates
The River of Life has no meaning,
no good, no bad, no better, no worse,
no love, no hate, no fear, no anger, no joy.
The River of Life has no judgment, no expectation.
The River of Life just IS.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Good manners sometimes means simply
putting up with other people's bad manners.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Better learn balance. Balance is key.
Balance good, karate good. Everything good.
Balance bad, better pack up, go home. Understand?
- Miyagi: character in the movie Karate Kid
I find that he is happiest
of whom the world says least, good or bad.
- Thomas Jefferson
Relax. Take a day off.
Go for a long silent walk in the woods.
The world will still be there tomorrow -
as good and as bad as ever.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A bad peace is better than a good war.
- Yiddish Proverb
Correcting bad habits cannot be done
by forbidding or punishment.
- Robert Baden-Powell (the founder of scouting)
Good judgement comes from experience.
Experience comes from bad judgement.
- Jim Horning
Every form of addiction is bad,
no matter whether the narcotic
be alcohol or morphine or idealism.
- Carl Jung
Never has there been a good war or a bad peace.
- Benjamin Franklin
There is no odor so bad as that
which arises from goodness tainted.
- Henry David Thoreau
It is easier to prevent bad habits than to break them.
- Benjamin Franklin
The bad news is time flies.
The good news is you're the pilot.
- Michael Althsuler
Don't take rejection personally.
Don't let someone else's bad day spoil your day.
As long as you never reject yourself, you'll be fine.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is fully as bad as you think it is,
so never think life is bad.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
History will have to record that the greatest tragedy
of this period of social transition
was not the strident clamor of the bad people,
but the appalling silence of the good people.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Let me give you a definition of ethics:
It is good to maintain and further life
it is bad to damage and destroy life.
- Albert Schweitzer
About morals: I know only that
what is moral is what you feel good after
and what is immoral is what you feel bad after.
- Ernest Hemingway
Judgment is discernment on a bad hair day.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
If you look for the bad in people
expecting to find it, you surely will.
- Abraham Lincoln
I'm having a bad day. I am not size six.
My legs are not skinny as sticks,
and dammit, someone's got to pay.
I'm afraid that I can't satisfy myself
and that my happiness depends on someone else.
I feel weak, so you're gonna take the fall.
You're so shallow.
- Jewel
When I do good, I feel good.
When I do bad, I feel bad.
That's my religion.
- Abraham Lincoln
We will have to repent in this generation,
not merely for the vitriolic words and actions of the bad people,
but for the appalling silence of the good people.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
We cannot make good news out of bad practice.
- Edward R. Murrow
Bad habits are like a comfortable bed,
easy to get into, but hard to get out of.
- Proverb
When we got into office, the thing
that surprised me most
was to find that things were just as bad
as we'd been saying they were.
- John F. Kennedy
There was never a good war or a bad peace.
- Benjamin Franklin
Faith is trusting in the good.
Fear is putting your trust in the bad.
- Rhonda Byrne
The only thing worse than a bad day is no day at all.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
When trouble arises and things look bad,
there is always one individual who perceives a solution
and is willing to take command.
Very often, that individual is crazy.
- Dave Barry
If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company.
- Jean-Paul Sartre
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.