The man who is successful is the man who is useful.
- Bourke Cockran
Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand 
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
- W. C. Fields
A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.
- Benjamin Franklin
A man likes his wife to be
just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness,
and just stupid enough to admire it.
- Israel Zangwill
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
A man is a fool if he drinks before he reaches the age of 50,
and a fool if he doesn't afterward.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy,
the first question I ask myself is:
is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
- Rita Rudner
Afraid? Me? A man who's licked
his weight in wild caterpillars?
Afraid? You bet I'm afraid!
- Groucho Marx
One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash
One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain
I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln
Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde
One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
- Robert A. Heinlein
Whenever I date a guy, I think,
"Is this the man I want my children
to spend their weekends with?"
- Rita Rudner
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman -
before marriage and after marriage.
- Anonymous
Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)
He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.
- Mae West
Don't marry a man to reform him -
that's what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx
Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
Give a man one rabbit, and he will eat for a day;
give a man two rabbits, and he will
feed his family and his neighbors
and return you 64,768 rabbits in change.
- Anonymous
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
You can lead a man to Congress,
but you can't make him think.
- Milton Berle
I am a man of fixed and unbending principles,
the first of which is to be flexible at all times.
- Everett Dirksen
A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler
A man is incomplete until he is married.
After that, he is finished.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
A man is usually more careful of his money
than he is of his principles.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway
is usually a poor judge of distance.
- Laurence J. Peter
An excellent man;
he has no enemies;
and none of his friends like him.
- Oscar Wilde
A man can't be too careful in the choice of enemies.
- Oscar Wilde
If it keeps up, man will atrophy
all his limbs but the push-button finger.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
The savage in man is never quite eradicated.
- Henry David Thoreau
Man can hardly even recognize the devils of his own creation.
- Albert Schweitzer
Man is a credulous animal, and must believe something;
in the absence of good grounds for belief,
he will be satisfied with bad ones.
- Bertrand Russell
The civilized man has built a coach,
but has lost the use of his feet.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The man who does not read good books
has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain
It appears to be a law that you cannot have
a deep sympathy with both man and nature.
- Henry David Thoreau
It is sad but unfortunately true that
man learns nothing from history.
- Carl Jung
Never stir up litigation.
A worse man can scarcely be found than one who does this.
- Abraham Lincoln
Morality which depends upon the helplessness
of a man or woman has not much to recommend it.
Morality is rooted in the purity of our hearts.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
The reason why the world lacks unity,
and lies broken and in heaps,
is, because man is disunited with himself.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The way for a young man to rise is
to improve himself in every way he can,
never suspecting that anybody wishes to hinder him.
- Abraham Lincoln
Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say,
abstains from giving us wordy evidence of the fact.
- George Eliot
If I knew for a certainty that a man was coming to my house
with the conscious design of doing me good,
I should run for my life.
- Henry David Thoreau
Show me a sane man, and I will cure him for you.
- Carl Jung
Clothes make the man.
Naked people have little or no influence on society.
- Mark Twain
If you can not answer a man's argument,
all is not lost; you can still call him vile names.
- Elbert Hubbard
I choose my friends for their good looks,
my acquaintances for their good characters,
and my enemies for their intellects.
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde
If a man smiles all the time,
he's probably selling something that doesn't work.
- George Carlin
Every man thinks God is on his side.
- Jean Anouilh
You know your god is man-made when he
hates all the same people you do.
- Anonymous
Man's nature is not essentially evil.
Brute nature has been known to
yield to the influence of love.
You must never despair of human nature.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
You can always tell when a man's well informed.
His views are pretty much like your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Books serve to show a man
that those original thoughts of his
aren't very new at all.
- Abraham Lincoln
We are born believing.
A man bears beliefs as a tree bears apples.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I would rather trust a woman's instinct than a man's reason.
- Stanley Baldwin
A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers,
looks around for a coffin.
- H. L. Mencken
Man is a clever animal who behaves like an imbecile.
- Albert Schweitzer
A clever man commits no minor blunders.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother
why the bride changed her mind.
What do you mean? responded her mother.
Well, she went down the aisle with one man,
and came back with another.
- Anonymous
Man will occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
- Winston Churchill
The man who can smile when things go wrong
has thought of someone else he can blame it on.
- Robert Bloch
Many a man owes his success to his first wife
and his second wife to his success.
- Jim Backus
Stay hopeless and confused. Keep polishing those skills.
- the movie When a Man Loves a Woman (1994)
Too often the strong, silent man is silent only because
he does not know what to say, and is reputed strong
only because he has remained silent.
- Winston Churchill
I want to be the white man's brother, not his brother-in-law.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.