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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Quotes about Trials

The gem cannot be polished without friction,
nor man perfected without trials.
- Confucius

If life is a trial, who is the judge and jury?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Only through experience of trial and suffering
can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared,
ambition inspired, and success achieved.
- Helen Keller

Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet.
Only through experiences of trial and suffering
can the soul be strengthened,
vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.
- Helen Keller

I hope we shall crush in its birth
the aristocracy of our monied corporations
which dare already to challenge our government
to a trial by strength,
and bid defiance to the laws of our country.
- Thomas Jefferson (from a letter to George Logan, Nov. 12th, 1816)

Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz

Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life ... full of loneliness, and misery,
and suffering, and unhappiness,
and it's all over much too quickly.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall

Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec

The trick is growing up without growing old.
- Casey Stengel

It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)

Life is defined more by its contrasts than its samenesses;
Life is defined more by its risks than the many securities.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill

Life is always lived in the eye-of-the-storm
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

To the young child, all life is a great adventure -
when did we grow so dull and brittle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs.
- Anonymous

Old age is fifteen years older than I am.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln

Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous

Life is serious, get out your magic wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.
- John Lennon

The difference between school and life?
In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test.
In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.
- Tom Bodett

In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.
- Charles M. Schulz in his Peanuts cartoon

Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born
at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
- Mark Twain

Life is a journey - enjoy the journey.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
- Oscar Wilde

Life only
appears to be
rushing toward us
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
- Mark Twain

One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash

It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay,
another falls spectacularly to pieces.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary

Life is a reflection of intent.
Love reflects love.
Hate reflects hate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Bringing a childlike wonder
and a beginner's mind to life
maximizes both success and joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

In critical moments men sometimes see
exactly what they wish to see.
- the character Spock of the television series Star Trek

Life is lived in the living.
Set aside convention, caution,
and arbitrary "rules" about how
life is supposed to be lived.
Choose! Explore! Adventure!
Live life to the fullest.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition,
is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit you could possibly have.
- Dale Carnegie

Every man prefers belief to the exercise of judgment.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Joy is a choice - but it isn't an easy choice.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden

The true meaning of life is to plant trees,
under whose shade you do not expect to sit.
- Nelson Henderson

The power of man has grown in every sphere, except over himself.
- Winston Churchill

Life is really simple,
but we insist on making it complicated.
- Confucius

One can never consent to creep when one feels the impulse to soar.
- Helen Keller

Life is as easy or as hard as you think it is.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If life is a bowl of cherries, then what am I doing in the pits?
- Erma Bombeck

I never accepted the idea
that I had to be guided by
some pattern or blueprint.
- Little Richard

A big part of letting go is recognizing
when it is time to stay in a situation
and when it is time to move on.
- Darren L. Johnson

I Dream This Day of Wondrous Things,
of Peace and Hope and Pride.
I Dance My Dance with Life Today,
I'm Filled with Love Inside.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie

We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton

It takes a big cat to be number 2.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Play with life, laugh with life,
dance lightly with life,
and smile at the riddles of life,
knowing that life's only true lessons
are writ small in the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Knavery and flattery are blood relations.
- Abraham Lincoln

All diseases run into one - old age.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Most men lead lives of quiet desperation
and go to the grave with the song still in them.
- Henry David Thoreau

Is today a day to gather strength from the storm -
a day to to learn life lessons for the next battle?
Or is today a day to sit by the fire
and watch the storm rage outside?
Either way, the storm is just life.
Give thanks for all of Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

Time, like life itself, has no inherent meaning.
We give our own meaning to time as to life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Sucking the marrow out of life
doesn't mean choking on the bone.
- Robin Williams as John Keating
in the 1989 movie Dead Poets Society

The essence of all religions is one.
Only their approaches are different.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle,
and the life of the candle will not be shortened.
Happiness never decreases by being shared.
- The Buddha

It's never too late -
never too late to start over,
never too late to be happy.
- Jane Fonda

Any idiot can face a crisis.
It's the day-to-day living that wears you out.
- Anton Chekhov

You can observe a lot by just watching.
- Yogi Berra

Life is a succession of lessons
which must be lived to be understood.
- Helen Keller


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.