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Funny Quotes about Sin

After the first blush of sin, comes its indifference.
- Henry David Thoreau

Our honorable and worthy ancestors knew that the world was flat,
motionless, and the center of the universe.
They knew the human body could not withstand
the forces of traveling faster than 19 mph.
They knew that the way to salvation was
exorcising witches and slaying non-believers.
They knew that it was a mortal sin to marry
someone of a different skin color.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A sin is anything you do which goes against yourself
- don Miguel Ruiz

The worst sin toward our fellow creatures
is not to hate them,
but to be indifferent to them:
that's the essence of inhumanity.
- George Bernard Shaw

To sin by silence when they should protest makes cowards of men.
- Abraham Lincoln

If the misery of the poor be caused
not by the laws of nature,
but by our institutions,
great is our sin.
- Charles Darwin

You shall not covet your neighbor's house;
you shall not covet your neighbor's wife,
nor his male servant, nor his female servant,
nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor's.
- Exodus 20:17

Then came Peter to him, and said,
Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me,
and I forgive him? till seven times?
Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee,
Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.
- Matthew 18:21-22

Do feuds ever end?
Only when both sides shake hands,
and agree that there is no winner, no loser,
only people who have wearied of fighting
and desire to live in peace.
For many years, Northern Ireland was locked
in a murderous and seemingly unending feud.
The key to ending the feud was a shared commitment
that peace was more important than vengeance.
That is always the choice to be made.
The organizers of an April 10, 2009
joint Protestant-Catholic commemoration
of the Northern Ireland dead,
comprised of members of the once-outlawed Sinn Fein
as well as their once-avowed enemies,
referred to, "the terrible, random nature
of death in war and civil conflict."
Some lessons have been learned, many more remain.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Martyrdom covers a multitude of sins.
- Mark Twain

It is better to do one's own duty,
however defective it may be,
than to follow the duty of another,
however well one may perform it.
He who does his duty as
his own nature reveals it, never sins.
- Lao Tzu

There are nine requisites for contented living:
HEALTH enough to make work a pleasure;
WEALTH enough to support your needs;
STRENGTH enough to battle with difficulties and forsake them;
GRACE enough to confess your sins and overcome them;
PATIENCE enough to toil until some good is accomplished;
CHARITY enough to see some good in your neighbor;
LOVE enough to move you to be useful and helpful to others;
FAITH enough to make real the things of God;
HOPE enough to remove all anxious fears concerning the future.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future.
- Oscar Wilde

The self-assured believer is a greater sinner
in the eyes of God than the troubled disbeliever
- Soren Kierkegaard

To compel a man to furnish funds for the propagation of ideas
he disbelieves and abhors is sinful and tyrannical.
- Thomas Jefferson

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
- W. C. Fields

A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.
- Benjamin Franklin

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash

One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

A man likes his wife to be
just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness,
and just stupid enough to admire it.
- Israel Zangwill

Give a man one rabbit, and he will eat for a day;
give a man two rabbits, and he will
feed his family and his neighbors
and return you 64,768 rabbits in change.
- Anonymous

Don't marry a man to reform him -
that's what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

A man is a fool if he drinks before he reaches the age of 50,
and a fool if he doesn't afterward.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln

Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)

Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde

You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

Whenever I date a guy, I think,
"Is this the man I want my children
to spend their weekends with?"
- Rita Rudner

You can lead a man to Congress,
but you can't make him think.
- Milton Berle

A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler

There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman -
before marriage and after marriage.
- Anonymous

One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

I am a man of fixed and unbending principles,
the first of which is to be flexible at all times.
- Everett Dirksen

Afraid? Me? A man who's licked
his weight in wild caterpillars?
Afraid? You bet I'm afraid!
- Groucho Marx

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy,
the first question I ask myself is:
is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
- Rita Rudner

He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.
- Mae West

A man is incomplete until he is married.
After that, he is finished.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother
why the bride changed her mind.
What do you mean? responded her mother.
Well, she went down the aisle with one man,
and came back with another.
- Anonymous

Beauty is the bait which with delight
allures man to enlarge his kind.
- Socrates

Man tends to treat all of his opinions as principles.
- Herbert Sebastian Agar

Give the right man two fishes and some bread,
and he will feed the world;
give the wrong man two fishes and some bread
and he will invent the fast-food fish sandwich.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The savage in man is never quite eradicated.
- Henry David Thoreau

The civilized man has built a coach,
but has lost the use of his feet.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

A clever man commits no minor blunders.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

The man who reads nothing at all
is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers.
- Thomas Jefferson

Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller

Never stir up litigation.
A worse man can scarcely be found than one who does this.
- Abraham Lincoln

Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say,
abstains from giving us wordy evidence of the fact.
- George Eliot

I would rather trust a woman's instinct than a man's reason.
- Stanley Baldwin

It is sad but unfortunately true that
man learns nothing from history.
- Carl Jung

I will far rather see the race of man extinct
than that we should become less than beasts
by making the noblest of God's creation,
woman, the object of our lust.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

It appears to be a law that you cannot have
a deep sympathy with both man and nature.
- Henry David Thoreau

Man is a credulous animal, and must believe something;
in the absence of good grounds for belief,
he will be satisfied with bad ones.
- Bertrand Russell

A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers,
looks around for a coffin.
- H. L. Mencken

You know your god is man-made when he
hates all the same people you do.
- Anonymous

Man's role is uncertain, undefined, and perhaps unnecessary.
- Margaret Mead

You can always tell when a man's well informed.
His views are pretty much like your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

I choose my friends for their good looks,
my acquaintances for their good characters,
and my enemies for their intellects.
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde

Man can hardly even recognize the devils of his own creation.
- Albert Schweitzer

Too often the strong, silent man is silent only because
he does not know what to say, and is reputed strong
only because he has remained silent.
- Winston Churchill

Mr. Attlee is a very modest man.
Indeed he has a lot to be modest about.
- Winston Churchill

Every man thinks God is on his side.
- Jean Anouilh

I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man,
and I hate people like that!
- Tom Lehrer

The way for a young man to rise is
to improve himself in every way he can,
never suspecting that anybody wishes to hinder him.
- Abraham Lincoln


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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