Funny Quotes about Robbers

Jesus said: "A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho,
when he fell into the hands of robbers.
They stripped him of his clothes, beat him
and went away, leaving him half dead.
A priest happened to be going down the same road,
and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side.
So too, a Levite [religious leader],
when he came to the place and saw him,
passed by on the other side.
But a Samaritan [Samaritans and Jews generally disliked
and were suspicious of each other] came where the man was;
and when he saw him, he took pity on him.
He went to him and bandaged his wounds ... and ...
took him to an inn and took care of him. ...
Jesus [said] "Go and do likewise."
- Luke 10:25-37 (The Parable of the Good Samaritan)

I've always believed that if done properly,
armed robbery doesn't have to be an unpleasant experience.
- the movie Thelma & Louise

My father always told me that
all businessmen were sons of bitches,
but I never believed it till now.
- John F. Kennedy

It is the things for which there is no evidence
that are believed with passion.
- Bertrand Russell

Why, sometimes I've believed as many as
six impossible things before breakfast.
- Lewis Carroll

Sometimes I've believed as many as
six impossible things before breakfast.
- Lewis Carroll

We are all atheists about most of the gods
that societies have ever believed in.
Some of us just go one god further.
- Richard Dawkins

Those who won our independence...
valued liberty as an end and as a means.
They believed liberty to be the secret of happiness
and courage to be the secret of liberty.
- Louis D. Brandeis

Even the truth, when believed, is a lie.
You must experience the truth, not believe it.
- Werner Erhard

No statement should be believed because it is made by an authority.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Friendship, like the immortality of the soul,
is too good to be believed.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Only those who can leave behind everything they
have ever believed in can hope to escape.
- William S. Burroughs

Real love is never a selfish emotion.
If you want something from someone -
especially if that something is sex -
what you are feeling is not true love.
True love is about wanting happiness for the person you love -
and not about seeking happiness for yourself.
Fortunately, in most cases our own loving presence
is the greatest gift we can give to a person we love.
Nonetheless, the litmus test of love is knowing
we would choose never to see that person again
if we believed that distance would bring them greater happiness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Oh, Shrek. Don't worry.
Things just seem bad because it's dark and rainy
and Fiona's father hired a sleazy hitman to whack you.
- the movie Shrek 2

Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life was a lot simpler when what we honored was father and mother
rather than all major credit cards.
- Robert Orben

My father and he had one of those English friendships
which begins by avoiding the intimacies
and eventually eliminates speech altogether.
- Jorge Luis Borges

The existence of an anthropomorphic
"Father-figure" deity is not impossible,
merely exceptionally improbable and illogical.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant
I could hardly stand to have the old man around.
But when I got to be 21, I was astonished
at how much the old man had learned in seven years.
- Mark Twain

It doesn't matter who my father was.
It matters who I remember he was.
- Anne Sexton

When a father gives to his son, both laugh;
when a son gives to his father, both cry.
- William Shakespeare

The most important thing a father
can do for his children
is to love their mother.
- Henry Ward Beecher

So your father, or your mother,
never thought you were good enough - SO WHAT?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

My father considered a walk among the mountains
as the equivalent of churchgoing.
- Aldous Huxley

Dear Father in heaven, I'm not a praying man,
but if you're up there and you can hear me ...
show me the way... show me the way.
- It's a Wonderful Life (1946 movie)

My father always used to say that when you die,
if you've got five real friends, then you've had a great life.
- Lee Iacocca

A man cannot speak to his son, but as a father;
to his wife, but as a husband;
to his enemy, but upon terms:
whereas a friend may speak, as the case requires,
and not as it sorteth with the person.
- Francis Bacon

The child in me could not die as it should have died,
because according too legends it must find its father again.
The old legends knew, perhaps, that in absence
the father becomes glorified, deified, eroticized,
and this outrage against God the Father has to be atoned for.
The human father has to be confronted and recognized as human,
as man who created a child and then, by his absence,
left the child fatherless and then Godless.
- Anais Nin

I don't care whose fault this was, just get it sorted!
And could someone please bring me something deep fat fried
and smothered in chocolate.
- the movie Shrek 2

Greetings, cosmic children of the universe.
Welcome to my serenity circle.
Please leave all bad vibes outside the healing vortex.
- the movie Shrek the Third (2007)

You know what? Maybe there's a good reason
donkeys shouldn't talk.
- the movie Shrek (2001)

Are we there yet? are we there yet? are we there yet?
- said by Donkey in the movie Shrek 2

Thank you, gentlemen. Someday I will repay you,
unless of course I can't find you, or if I forget.
- the movie Shrek 2

It looks like we're up chocolate creek without a Popsicle stick!
- the movie Shrek 2 (2004)

You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly,
but I bet you ain't never seen a DONKEY fly!
- the movie Shrek (2001)

Donkey, you HAVE the right to remain silent.
What you lack, is the capacity.
- said by Shrek in the movie Shrek 2

They have come up with a perfect understanding.
He won't try to run her life,
and he won't try to run his, either.
- Anonymous

All our dreams can come true,
if we have the courage to pursue them.
- Walt Disney

Things may come to those who wait,
but only the things left by those who hustle.
- Abraham Lincoln

The will to believe chases out the rational mind,
whenever and wherever the two come into conflict.
- Philip K. Dick

"The time has come," the walrus said, "to talk of many things:
of shoes and ships - and sealing wax - of cabbages and kings."
- Lewis Carroll

The traveler sees what he sees,
the tourist sees what he has come to see.
- Gilbert K. Chesterton

Clouds come floating into my life,
no longer to carry rain or usher storm,
but to add color to my sunset sky.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask "Why me?"
Then a voice answers "Nothing personal,
your name just happened to come up. -
- Charlie Brown, in Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts

We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned,
so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
The old skin has to be shed before the new one can come.
- Joseph Campbell

In spite of unseasonable wind, snow
and unexpected weather of all sorts -
a gardener still plants.
And tends what they have planted ...
believing that Spring will come.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Being angry is as close as a human being
can come to experiencing hell on earth.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Don't ask yourself what the world needs;
ask yourself what makes you come alive.
And then go and do that.
Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.
- Howard Thurman

Those who have come here to hate should leave now;
for in their hate, they only betray themselves.
- Terry Goodkind

Some people come into our lives and quickly go.
Some people stay for awhile,
and move our souls to dance.
They awaken us to a new understanding,
leave footprints on our hearts,
and we are never, ever the same.
- Flavia Weedn

The secret of making dreams come true
can be summarized in four C's.
They are Curiosity, Confidence, Courage, and Constancy;
and the greatest of these is Confidence.
- Walt Disney

You can't stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to you.
You have to go to them sometimes.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Take the initiative - don't wait for life to come to you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When you're drowning, you don't say,
"I would be incredibly pleased if someone
would have the foresight to notice
me drowning and come and help me,"
you just scream.
- John Lennon

The fastest way to destroy love
is to make a goal out of it,
because people who are trying to be loved
come from a place that they're not loved.
- Werner Erhard

Youth, large, lusty, loving -
Youth, full of grace, force, fascination.
Do you know that Old Age may come after you
with equal grace, force, fascination?
- Walt Whitman

We may have all come on different ships,
but we're in the same boat now.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Great opportunities to help others seldom come,
but small ones surround us every day.
- Sally Koch

My greatest Power and my greatest Inner Peace come
when I Intend my future, and when I avoid Expecting it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to
criticize or attack the government of my own country.
I make up for lost time when I come home.
- Winston Churchill

Opportunities to find deeper powers within ourselves
come when life seems most challenging.
- Joseph Campbell

Well, when you come down to it,
I don't see that a reporter could do much to a president, do you?
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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