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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Quotes about Ranges

The human spirit ranges across a truly amazing
diversity of experiences and emotions -
the highest peaks and the lowest valleys.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There are risks and costs to action.
But they are far less than the long range
risks of comfortable inaction.
- John F. Kennedy

Many people know so little about what
is beyond their short range of experience.
They look within themselves - and find nothing!
Therefore they conclude that there
is nothing outside themselves either.
- Helen Keller

Instead of being presented with stereotypes
by age, sex, color, class, or religion,
children must have the opportunity
to learn that within each range,
some people are loathsome and some are delightful.
- Margaret Mead

Life is defined more by its contrasts than its samenesses;
Life is defined more by its risks than the many securities.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Life is defined more by its risks than by its samenesses.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Take risks: if you win, you will be happy;
if you lose, you will be wise.
- Anonymous

With courage, you will dare to take risks,
have the strength to be compassionate,
and the wisdom to be humble.
Courage is the foundation of integrity.
- Keshavan Nair

He who spends time regretting the past,
loses the present and risks the future.
- Quevedo

He who is not courageous enough to take risks
will accomplish nothing in life.
- Muhammad Ali

Pitiful is the person who is afraid of taking risks.
Perhaps this person will never
be disappointed or disillusioned;
perhaps she won't suffer the way
people do when they have a dream to follow.
But when the person looks back -
and at some point everyone look back -
she will hear her heart, saying,
"What have you done with the miracles
that God planted in your days?
What have you done with the talents
God bestowed on you?"
- Paulo Coelho

Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz

Life ... full of loneliness, and misery,
and suffering, and unhappiness,
and it's all over much too quickly.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall

Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde

The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec

Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

The trick is growing up without growing old.
- Casey Stengel

It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
- Oscar Wilde

The difference between school and life?
In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test.
In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.
- Tom Bodett

Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born
at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
- Mark Twain

The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous

Old age is fifteen years older than I am.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.
- John Lennon

To the young child, all life is a great adventure -
when did we grow so dull and brittle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If life is a trial, who is the judge and jury?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life only
appears to be
rushing toward us
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.
- Charles M. Schulz in his Peanuts cartoon

No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln

Life is a journey - enjoy the journey.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
- Mark Twain

One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill

Life is always lived in the eye-of-the-storm
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash

Life is serious, get out your magic wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs.
- Anonymous

The life of inner peace,
being harmonious and without stress,
is the easiest type of existence.
- Norman Vincent Peale

I never accepted the idea
that I had to be guided by
some pattern or blueprint.
- Little Richard

If life is a bowl of cherries, then what am I doing in the pits?
- Erma Bombeck

Time, like life itself, has no inherent meaning.
We give our own meaning to time as to life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition,
is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit you could possibly have.
- Dale Carnegie

Knavery and flattery are blood relations.
- Abraham Lincoln

It's never too late -
never too late to start over,
never too late to be happy.
- Jane Fonda

Man is a credulous animal, and must believe something;
in the absence of good grounds for belief,
he will be satisfied with bad ones.
- Bertrand Russell

We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)

Life is really simple,
but we insist on making it complicated.
- Confucius

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

I can't go back to yesterday -
because I was a different person then.
- Lewis Carroll

All diseases run into one - old age.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Life's burdens are lighter when I laugh at myself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Am I not destroying my enemies
when I make friends of them?
- Abraham Lincoln

You don't have the power to make life "fair,"
but you do have the power to make life joyful.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Iron rusts from disuse;
water loses its purity from stagnation...
even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind.
- Leonardo da Vinci

When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie

We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton

The essence of all religions is one.
Only their approaches are different.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

She generally gave herself very good advice,
(though she very seldom followed it).
- Lewis Carroll

In critical moments men sometimes see
exactly what they wish to see.
- the character Spock of the television series Star Trek

Play with life, laugh with life,
dance lightly with life,
and smile at the riddles of life,
knowing that life's only true lessons
are writ small in the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Knowing your own darkness is the best method
for dealing with the darknesses of other people.
- Carl Jung

All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

A common denominator of all religions is that
they have the power to bring out the best and the worst in people.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is too important to be taken seriously.
- Oscar Wilde

Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.
- the movie National Lampoon's Animal House (1978)

Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

The most powerful force in the universe is: gossip.
- Dave Barry

Life is as easy or as hard as you think it is.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Joy is a choice - but it isn't an easy choice.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.