It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
Don't marry a man to reform him -
that's what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein
After fifteen minutes I wanted to marry her,
and after half an hour
I completely gave up the idea of stealing her purse.
- the movie Take the Money and Run (1969)
He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.
- Mae West
One should always be in love.
That is the reason one should never marry.
- Oscar Wilde
This day I will marry my friend,
the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, love.
- Anonymous
Our honorable and worthy ancestors knew that the world was flat,
motionless, and the center of the universe.
They knew the human body could not withstand
the forces of traveling faster than 19 mph.
They knew that the way to salvation was
exorcising witches and slaying non-believers.
They knew that it was a mortal sin to marry
someone of a different skin color.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
By all means marry.
If you get a good wife, you'll be happy.
If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher
and that is a good thing for any man.
- Socrates
You don't marry someone you can live with,
you marry the person who you cannot live without.
- Anonymous
I didn't want to marry anybody else in town.
I want my baby to look like you.
- It's a Wonderful Life (1946 movie)
Don't marry the person you think you can live with;
marry only the individual you think you can't live without.
- James C. Dobson
He who marries for love without money
has good nights and sorry days.
- Anonymous
Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband
a month before she marries him
and what she thinks of him a year afterward,
and you will have the truth about him.
- H. L. Mencken
The first sigh of love is the last breath of wisdom.
- Anonymous
Love is an irresistible desire
to be irresistibly desired.
- Robert Frost
Love conquers all things except poverty and a toothache.
- Mae West
Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another.
- H. L. Mencken
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
- H. L. Mencken
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein
Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter
quite like unrequited love.
- Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts comic
Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde
Love is like an hourglass,
with the heart filling up as the brain empties.
- Jules Renard
Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.
- H. L. Mencken
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
The Wedding March always reminds me of the music
played when soldiers go into battle.
- Heinrich Heine
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation.
- Khalil Gibran
Love thy neighbor -
and if he happens to be tall,
debonair and devastating,
it will be that much easier.
- Mae West
Love is only a dirty trick played on us
to achieve continuation of the species.
- W. Somerset Maugham
Love is a grave mental disease.
- Plato
When you are courting a nice girl
an hour seems like a second.
When you sit on a red-hot cinder
a second seems like an hour.
That's relativity.
- Albert Einstein
Oh, come on, Shrek, wake up and smell the pheromones!
- the movie Shrek (2001)
True love is like ghosts,
which everyone talks about and few have seen.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
One's first love is always perfect
until one meets one's second love.
- Elizabeth Aston
I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner
Save a boyfriend for a rainy day -
and another, in case it doesn't rain.
- Mae West
A woman in love can't be reasonable -
or she probably wouldn't be in love.
- Mae West
A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous
My wife ran off with my best friend, and I sure do miss him.
- Anonymous
Love looks through a telescope;
envy, through a microscope.
- Josh Billings
Love is what makes two people
sit in the middle of a park bench
when there is plenty of room at both ends.
- Anonymous
True love comes quietly,
without banners or flashing lights.
If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
- Erich Segal
The only true love is love at first sight;
second sight dispels it.
- Israel Zangwill
Love is metaphysical gravity.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson
Love is loving what your lover loves.
- Anonymous
My boyfriend and I broke up.
He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
- Rita Rudner
I'd like to kiss ya, but I just washed ma hair.
- the movie The Cabin in the Cotton
A relationship, I think, is like a shark.
You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall (1977)
Where there is great love,
there are always miracles.
- Willa Cather
Know the power and the peace of saying,
"I love you just the way you are."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Beauty is the bait which with delight
allures man to enlarge his kind.
- Socrates
I want a girl just like good old mom,
who is different in every way.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I have found that if you love life,
life will love you back.
- Arthur Rubinstein
Love Without Limits.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Look your best - who said love is blind?
- Mae West
We are not held back by the love we didn't receive in the past,
but by the love we're not extending in the present.
- Marianne Williamson
Beauty is an outward gift,
which is seldom despised,
except by those to whom it has been refused.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the wedding cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it;
Whenever you're right, shut up.
- Ogden Nash
Love is the flower you've got to let grow.
- John Lennon
You may call God love, you may call God goodness.
But the best name for God is compassion.
- Meister Eckhart
Life is a reflection of intent.
Love reflects love.
Hate reflects hate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Do you feel stuck?
Whether in a project, a job, a relationship,
or some other situation,
there is a time for perseverance,
and a time for letting go and moving on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Lord, grant that I might not so much
seek to be loved as to love.
- St. Francis of Assisi
Where There is Love, Nothing is Missing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All discarded lovers should be given a second chance,
but with somebody else.
- Mae West
To the people who love you,
you are beautiful already.
This is not because they're
blind to your shortcomings
but because they so clearly see your soul.
- Victoria Moran
Love me when I least deserve it,
because that's when I really need it.
- Swedish Proverb
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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