Enter one or two keywords to search these Funny Quotes.

Hint: keep it simple, like life twain

Funny Quotes about Life
Funny Quotes about Life | Funny Love Quotes | About
Search:   A-   B-   Ca-   Co-   D-   E-   F-   G-   H-    I-    J-K-L   M-   N-O   Pa-   Pr-   Q-R   Sa-   Sk-   T-   U-V-W-X-Y-Z
Follow my Humorous yet Insightful Quote of the Day by Email:

Funny Quotes about Literature

It is curious to observe what different
ideals of happiness people cherish,
and in what singular places they look
for this well-spring of their life.
Many look for it in the hoarding of riches,
some in the pride of power,
and others in the achievements of art and literature;
a few seek it in the exploration of their own minds,
or in search for knowledge.
- Helen Keller

Literature is my Utopia. Here I am not disenfranchised.
No barrier of the senses shuts me out from
the sweet, gracious discourses of my book friends.
They talk to me without embarrassment or awkwardness.
- Helen Keller

Be curious, not judgmental.
- Walt Whitman

Be curious; be adventurous; live life full-out.
Accept the challenge, and reach for the brass ring.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is curious - curious that physical courage
should be so common in the world, and moral courage so rare
- Mark Twain

We keep moving forward, opening new doors,
and doing new things, because we're curious
and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.
- Walt Disney

Be less curious about people,
and more curious about ideas.
- Marie Curie

To keep your thinking young, stay curious.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I have no special talent.
I am only passionately curious.
- Albert Einstein

Children are curious and are risk takers.
They have lots of courage.
They venture out into a world
that is immense and dangerous.
A child initially trusts life
and the processes of life.
- John Bradshaw

That's what learning is, after all;
not whether we lose the game,
but how we lose and h
ow we've changed because of it
and what we take away from it
that we never had before,
to apply to other games.
Losing, in a curious way, is winning.
- Richard Bach

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand

"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)

Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer

It's not the size of the dog in the fight,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
- Anonymous

Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein

Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire

I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
- Will Rogers

Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein

If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
- Anonymous

I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln

Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein

Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death

Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)

Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill

Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove

Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek

I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer

The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain

DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

The lawyer's truth is not Truth,
but consistency or a consistent expediency.
- Henry David Thoreau

The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous

The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain

I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man,
and I hate people like that!
- Tom Lehrer

Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Do not speak to me of rules.
This is war! This is not a game of cricket!
- from the movie The Bridge On The River Kwai

Though I am a servant, I am not your servant.
- Ursula K. Le Guin

The rich are not born skeptical or cynical.
They are made that way by events, circumstances.
- Paul Getty

Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation.
- Khalil Gibran

Ending a sentence with a preposition is
something up with which I will not put.
- Winston Churchill

There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie

The only advantage of not being too good a housekeeper
is that your guests are so pleased
to feel how very much better they are.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

It's not clutter, it's my unique filing system.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Normal is not something to aspire to,
it's something to get away from.
- Jodie Foster

The existence of an anthropomorphic
"Father-figure" deity is not impossible,
merely exceptionally improbable and illogical.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If Christ were here now there is one thing
he would not be - a Christian.
- Mark Twain

Science is a wonderful thing
if one does not have to earn one's living at it.
- Albert Einstein

My advice to you is get married:
if you find a good wife you'll be happy;
if not, you'll become a philosopher.
- Socrates

Do not take life too seriously.
You will never get out of it alive.
- Elbert Hubbard

It's not a mess.
It's a physical manifestation of
a wonderfully complex ability to
assess and compartmentalize information.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

The church is always trying to get other people to reform;
it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little,
by way of example.
- Mark Twain

The mind is not a vessel to be filled
but a fire to be kindled.
- Plutarch

I once had a rose named after me
and I was very flattered.
But I was not pleased to read
the description in the catalogue:
no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

The trouble with the world is not
that people know too little,
but that they know so many things that ain't so.
- Mark Twain

I think that there is nothing, not even crime,
more opposed to poetry, to philosophy, ay, to life itself
than this incessant business.
- Henry David Thoreau

It's not very heroic to slay dragons.
Dragons are generally very peaceful and well behaved.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems,
but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
- Herm Albright

People who say it cannot be done should not
interrupt those who are doing it.
- George Bernard Shaw


Please sign up on the form below to receive
my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email.

You can also search my large collection of Funny Quotes.

May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Funny Quotes

 


All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.