Funny Quotes about Dissent

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand

"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer

It's not the size of the dog in the fight,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain

Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West

Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein

Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek

DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
- Will Rogers

I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein

Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove

I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln

I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death

Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire

I want to be the white man's brother, not his brother-in-law.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Genius may have its limitations,
but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
- Elbert Hubbard

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems,
but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
- Herm Albright

The objection to Puritans is not that
they try to make us think as they do,
but that they try to make us do as they think.
- H. L. Mencken

I do not believe that civilization will be wiped out
in a war fought with the atomic bomb.
Perhaps two-thirds of the people of the earth will be killed.
- Albert Einstein

The lawyer's truth is not Truth,
but consistency or a consistent expediency.
- Henry David Thoreau

The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous

Too often the strong, silent man is silent only because
he does not know what to say, and is reputed strong
only because he has remained silent.
- Winston Churchill

The rich are not born skeptical or cynical.
They are made that way by events, circumstances.
- Paul Getty

The person who says it cannot be done
should not interrupt the person who is doing it.
- Chinese proverb

Ending a sentence with a preposition is
something up with which I will not put.
- Winston Churchill

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our Light, not our Darkness, that most frightens us.
- Marianne Williamson

I am always ready to learn
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

There is no pleasure in having nothing to do;
the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.
- Mary Wilson Little

We are finally driven to monogamy
not by morality but by exhaustion.
- Erica Jong

I am not afraid of storms
for I am learning how to sail my ship.
- Louisa May Alcott

A loyal friend laughs at your jokes
when they're not so good,
and sympathizes with your problems
when they're not so bad.
- Arnold H. Glasgow

One minute you're in the lunchroom at Glenwood High
and you ... blink and you're 40,
you blink again and you can see movies
at half price on a senior citizen's pass.
Ask not for whom the bell tolls, or to put it more accurately,
ask not for whom the toilet flushes.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity

Belief is not the beginning but the end of all knowledge.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

For those who do not think,
it is best at least to rearrange
their prejudices once in a while.
- Luther Burbank

I do not believe in using women in combat,
because females are too fierce.
- Margaret Mead

I think that there is nothing, not even crime,
more opposed to poetry, to philosophy, ay, to life itself
than this incessant business.
- Henry David Thoreau

The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain

Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Science is a wonderful thing
if one does not have to earn one's living at it.
- Albert Einstein

The man who does not read good books
has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain

I'm sure we all agree that we ought to love one another
and I know there are people in the world
that do not love their fellow human beings
and I HATE people like that.
- Tom Lehrer

Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov

Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein

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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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Funny Quotes about Dissent

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