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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Quotes about Best

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx

I am easily satisfied with the very best.
- Winston Churchill

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

My wife ran off with my best friend, and I sure do miss him.
- Anonymous

A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next
to you saying "boy was that fun."
- The Maugles

Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)

Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire

Look your best - who said love is blind?
- Mae West

The best argument against democracy is
a five-minute conversation with the average voter.
- Winston Churchill

That's what Tiggers do best!
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

When you have got an elephant by the hind legs
and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run.
- Abraham Lincoln

If you refuse to accept anything but the best,
you very often get it.
- Somerset Maugham

The best way to appreciate your job
is to imagine yourself without one.
- Oscar Wilde

A common denominator of all religions is that
they have the power to bring out the best and the worst in people.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Honesty may be the best policy,
but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination,
dishonesty is the second-best policy.
- George Carlin

The best thing about the future is
that it comes one day at a time.
- Abraham Lincoln

Common looking people are the best in the world:
that is the reason the Lord makes so many of them.
- Abraham Lincoln

Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov

Speak when you are angry -
and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.
- Laurence J. Peter

Heaven must be an awfully dull place
if your best friends end up elsewhere.
- Anonymous

We have the best government that money can buy.
- Mark Twain

The age of a woman doesn't mean a thing.
The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Short words are best
and the old words, when short, are best of all.
- Winston Churchill

For those who do not think,
it is best at least to rearrange
their prejudices once in a while.
- Luther Burbank

Testing oneself is best when done alone.
- Jimmy Carter

The best remedy for a short temper is a long walk.
- Jacqueline Schiff

Knowing your own darkness is the best method
for dealing with the darknesses of other people.
- Carl Jung

Most people enjoy the inferiority of their best friends.
- Lord Chesterfield

Simply do your best, and you will avoid
self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.
- don Miguel Ruiz

Tolerance is the first principle of community;
it is the spirit which conserves
the best that all men think.
- Helen Keller

Best Friends: we're a parade - even by ourselves!
- Mary Anne Radmacher

To know yet to think that one does not know is best;
Not to know yet to think that one knows
will lead to difficulty.
- Lao Tzu

You may call God love, you may call God goodness.
But the best name for God is compassion.
- Meister Eckhart

Life is best when I wish neither to hurry the future nor to slow it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I believe that a simple and unassuming manner of life
is best for everyone, best both for the body and the mind.
- Albert Einstein

You have to accept whatever comes
and the only important thing is that you meet it with courage
and with the best that you have to give.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Today is a day to cover your best weapons in velvet.
Go gently into the world.
Hold your anger.
Keep your competitive spirit in check.
Some day you will need your fierce weapons,
but not today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The most erroneous stories are those
we think we know best -
and therefore never scrutinize or question.
- Stephen Jay Gould

The best way to gain self-confidence
is to do what you are afraid to do.
- Anonymous

The best way to predict the future is to create it.
- Peter F. Drucker

Infinite striving to be the best is man's duty;
it is its own reward.
Everything else is in God's hands.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

I have lost my seven best friends,
which is to say that God has had mercy on me
seven times without realizing it.
He lent a friendship, took it from me, and sent me another.
- Jean Cocteau

If we like what we do, if we always do our best,
then we are really enjoying life.
We are having fun, we don't get bored,
we don't have frustrations.
- don Miguel Ruiz

The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
- Dale Carnegie

Know the best and highest choices for health
and more often choose those things.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

There is some good in the worst of us
and some evil in the best of us.
When we discover this,
we are less prone to hate our enemies.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Be prepared for life -
to live happily and without regret,
knowing that you have done your best.
- the Boy Scout Handbook

The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy
is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet,
alone with the heavens, nature and God.
Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be.
- Anne Frank

It's a funny thing about life;
if you refuse to accept anything but the best,
you very often get it.
- W. Somerset Maugham

The best bridge between despair and hope is a good night's sleep.
- E. Joseph Cossman

In meditation practice, the best way to get somewhere
is to let go of trying to get anywhere at all.
- Jon Kabat-Zinn

That government is best which governs the least,
because its people discipline themselves.
- Thomas Jefferson

Success has a simple formula:
do your best, and people may like it.
- Sam Ewing

The time comes upon every public man
when it is best for him to keep his lips closed.
- Abraham Lincoln

The best friend is the man who in wishing me well
wishes it for my sake.
- Anonymous

Grow old along with me, the best is yet to be.
- Robert Browning

This bright new year is given me
To live each day with zest
To daily grow and try to be
My highest and my best.
- William Arthur Ward

The best way to get a bad law repealed
is to enforce it strictly.
- Abraham Lincoln

An optimist is one who makes the best
of what he gets the worst of.
- Anonymous

My dream is of a place and a time where America
will once again be seen as the last best hope of earth.
- Abraham Lincoln

The best road to progress is freedom's road.
- John F. Kennedy

I do the very best I know how -
the very best I can;
and I mean to keep on doing so until the end.
- Abraham Lincoln

The best morale exist when you never hear the word mentioned.
When you hear a lot of talk about it, it's usually lousy.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

If you're doing your best,
you won't have any time to worry about failure.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

May you never forget what is worth remembering,
or remember what is best forgotten.
- Anonymous

A good example is the best sermon.
- Benjamin Franklin

My experience has been that work is
almost the best way to pull oneself out of the depths.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Things turn out best for the people
who make the best of the way things turn out.
- Art Linkletter

When you do your best
you learn to accept yourself
- don Miguel Ruiz

The best time to make friends is before you need them.
- Ethel Barrymore


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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