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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Quotes about Alignment

Great relationships begin with two people who are each
self confident and who come to each other with the openness
to see and accept the other as a unique and wonderful person.
If there is true love and an alignment of fundamental values,
choose to join your life with your new partner
and vow never to criticize their nature -
the essence that makes them uniquely themselves.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

I am prepared to meet my Maker.
Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal
of meeting me is another matter.
- Winston Churchill

One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin

The time-traveling is just too dangerous.
Better that I devote myself to study
the other great mystery of the universe - women!
- the movie Back to the Future II

Hey, Marge. Isn't it great being married
to someone who's recklessly impulsive?
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)

You ask me if I keep a notebook
to record my great ideas.
I've only ever had one.
- Albert Einstein

We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner

I have great hopes that we shall love each other all our lives
as much as if we had never married at all.
- Lord Byron

Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Who in the world am I? Ah, that's the great puzzle.
- Lewis Carroll

As usual, there is a great woman behind every idiot.
- John Lennon

People who think they know everything
are a great annoyance to those of us who do.
- Isaac Asimov

To the young child, all life is a great adventure -
when did we grow so dull and brittle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I begin with the principle that all men are bores.
Surely no one will prove himself
so great a bore as to contradict me in this.
- Soren Kierkegaard

New York City is a great monument
to the power of money and greed...
a race for rent.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

I always seem to get inspiration and renewed vitality
by contact with this great novel land of yours
which sticks up out of the Atlantic.
- Winston Churchill

No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective

Silence is a source of great strength.
- Lao Tzu

Where there is great love,
there are always miracles.
- Willa Cather

The essence of life is not in
the great victories and grand failures,
but in the simple joys.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The magic words for a great relationship are,
"I love you just the way you are."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting,
So... get on your way!
- Dr. Seuss

If (s)he's an apple and you're an orange,
celebrate your differences -
make a great fruit salad.
Love isn't about being the same -
it's about being sweet with each other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Don't be afraid to give up the good to go for the great.
- John D. Rockefeller

Having a personal opinion is great.
Believing that one's personal opinion is absolute truth
leads to most of the world's troubles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I have a great deal of company in the house,
especially in the morning when nobody calls.
- Henry David Thoreau

To be one, to be united is a great thing.
But to respect the right to be different is maybe even greater.
- Bono

Neither a man nor a crowd nor a nation
can be trusted to act humanely
or to think sanely under the influence of a great fear.
- Bertrand Russell

The great end of life is not knowledge but action.
- Thomas Henry Huxley

Regrets and resentments cause great suffering but fix nothing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life in abundance comes only through great love.
- Elbert Hubbard

Great minds discuss ideas;
average minds discuss events;
small minds discuss people.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

I long to accomplish a great and noble task,
but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks
as if they were great and noble.
- Helen Keller

In great contests, each party claims to act
in accordance with the will of God.
Both may be, and one must be wrong.
- Abraham Lincoln

Dare to dream of your great success.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

It gives me great pleasure indeed to see the stubbornness
of an incorrigible nonconformist warmly acclaimed.
- Albert Einstein

Life is a great big canvas,
and you should throw all the paint you can on it.
- Danny Kaye

Dare to dream of your great success.
Become intimate with those things
which deeply motivate you
and regularly work toward
the realization of that mission.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

No crime is so great as daring to excel.
- Winston Churchill

Mostly, it is human to dislike surprises -
often with great intensity.
Be open to new ways;
sometimes newness just knocks on our door;
welcome it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If a man is called to be a street sweeper,
he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted,
or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.
He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts
of heaven and earth will pause to say,
here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

I have decided to stick with love.
Hate is too great a burden to bear.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions.
Small people always do that,
but the really great make you feel that
you, too, can become great.
- Mark Twain

The Two Great Lessons of Life: Choose Love & Trust God.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The challenge of living a great life is to create
a meaningful whole out of sometimes ill-fitting halves.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Keep courage. Whatever you do,
do not feel sorry for yourself.
You will win in a great age of opportunity.
- Richard L. Evans

The wise man looks into space,
and does not regard the small as too little,
nor the great as too much;
for he knows that there is no limit to dimensions.
- Lao Tzu

Love is the great miracle cure.
Loving ourselves works miracles in our lives.
- Louise L. Hay

Everything that is really great and inspiring
is created by the individual who can labor in freedom.
- Albert Einstein

Confidence is the most important single factor in this game,
and no matter how great your natural talent,
there is only one way to obtain and sustain it: work.
- Jack Nicklaus

If the misery of the poor be caused
not by the laws of nature,
but by our institutions,
great is our sin.
- Charles Darwin

Small opportunities are often
the beginning of great enterprises.
- Demosthenes

Living in fear of anything is a terrible waste
of what could be a great life.
If you live in fear of losing your job,
either you fear the embarrassment of being jobless,
or you fear the loss of material goods -
house, car, and such.
If you live in fear of losing your stuff and money,
it is clear that they own you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Do the difficult things while they are easy
and do the great things while they are small.
A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.
- Lao Tzu

The willow which bends to the tempest,
often escapes better than the oak which resists it;
and so in great calamities,
it sometimes happens that light and frivolous spirits
recover their elasticity and presence of mind sooner
than those of a loftier character.
- Albert Schweitzer

The great enemy of the truth is very often not the lie,
deliberate, contrived and dishonest,
but the myth, persistent, persuasive and unrealistic.
- John F. Kennedy

Confidence is that feeling by which the mind embarks
in great and honorable courses
with a sure hope and trust in itself.
- Marcus Tullius Cicero

When you become centered, suddenly there is great freedom
because you know you are not the mind and you are not the body.
- Osho

Unconditional war can no longer lead to unconditional victory.
It can no longer serve to settle disputes...
can no longer be of concern to great powers alone.
- John F. Kennedy

In principle, the great religions of the world
do not differ as much as they appear to.
- Ernest Holmes

Before we acquire great power
we must acquire wisdom to use it well.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Being is the great explainer.
- Henry David Thoreau

After climbing a great hill,
one only finds that there are many more hills to climb.
- Nelson Mandela

A Great Relationship is the Dance of Two Great Lives.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Most people say that is it is the intellect
which makes a great scientist.
They are wrong: it is character.
- Albert Einstein

In times of great stress or adversity,
it's always best to keep busy,
to plow your anger and your energy
into something positive.
- Lee Iacocca

No great man ever complains of want of opportunity.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

One of the surest ways to cause
yourself great suffering
is to insist upon being right -
to demand that all others view life
exactly as you view it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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