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Funny Quotes by Richard Feynman

The first principle is that you must not fool yourself -
and you are the easiest person to fool.
- Richard Feynman

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living;
the world owes you nothing; it was here first.
- Mark Twain PHOTO

The first sigh of love is the last breath of wisdom.
- Anonymous PHOTO

When I eventually met Mr. Right
I had no idea that his first name was Always.
- Rita Rudner

If he's first class, I'm traveling steerage.
- the movie Libeled Lady (1936)

When I first saw you, I thought you were handsome.
Then, of course, you spoke.
- the movie As Good As It Gets (1997)

If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
- Anonymous

Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde

Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy,
the first question I ask myself is:
is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
- Rita Rudner

I am a man of fixed and unbending principles,
the first of which is to be flexible at all times.
- Everett Dirksen

Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov

Those who have free seats at a play hiss first.
- Chinese Proverb

One's first love is always perfect
until one meets one's second love.
- Elizabeth Aston

There are two kinds of people,
those who do the work,
and those who take the credit.
Try to be in the first group;
there is less competition there.
- Indira Gandhi

Get the facts first.
You can distort them later.
- Mark Twain

Getting fired is nature's way to telling you
that you had the wrong job in the first place.
- Hal Lancaster

Smile first thing in the morning. Get it over with.
- W. C. Fields

The physician can bury his mistakes,
but the architect can only advise his client to plant vines -
so they should go as far as possible from home
to build their first buildings.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

We're more popular than Jesus now;
I don't know which will go first, rock 'n' roll or Christianity.
- John Lennon

Life is uncertain; always eat dessert first.
- Anonymous

If at first you don't succeed,
try, try, and try again.
Then give up.
There's no use being a damned fool about it.
- W. C. Fields

Many a man owes his success to his first wife
and his second wife to his success.
- Jim Backus

I don't know which will go first - rock 'n' roll or Christianity.
- John Lennon

There are four stages in a marriage.
First there's the affair,
then the marriage,
then children
and finally the fourth stage,
without which you cannot know a woman, the divorce.
- Norman Mailer

After the first blush of sin, comes its indifference.
- Henry David Thoreau

The only true love is love at first sight;
second sight dispels it.
- Israel Zangwill

Christianity will go. It will vanish and shrink.
I needn't argue with that; I'm right and I will be proved right.
We're more popular than Jesus now;
I don't know which will go first - rock and roll or Christianity.
- John Lennon

Apathy, indifference, not caring...
It may sound insensitive for me to say, "I don't care,"
but ask first to what I am indifferent.
I choose to be caring, compassionate
and kind toward all people,
and I also choose to be indifferent to gossip,
petty complaints, and idle chatter.
About those, I just don't care.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

To climb steep hills requires a slow pace at first.
- William Shakespeare PHOTO

All things at first appear difficult.
- Chinese proverb PHOTO

When we step on the battlefield, I will be
The First Boots On and the Last Boots Off.
- LtG. Hal Moore

Faith is taking the first step,
even when you don't see the whole staircase.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life.
- Anonymous

Tolerance is the first principle of community;
it is the spirit which conserves
the best that all men think.
- Helen Keller

Belief is a virus, and once it gets into you,
its first order of business is to preserve itself,
and the way it preserves itself
is to keep you from having any doubts,
and the way it keeps you from doubting
is to blind you to the way things really are.
- Philip Caputo

Always be a first-rate version of yourself,
instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.
- Judy Garland

Seek first to understand,
then to be understood.
- Stephen Covey

Lovers who have been left, lose confidence and become afraid.
They learn to leave relationships first.
The broken hearted become the heart breakers.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Experience is a hard teacher.
She gives the test first
and the lessons afterwards.
- Anonymous

First they ignore you, then they laugh at you,
then they fight you, then you win.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Give thanks for the rainbows, for the butterflies,
for all God's creatures - large and small,
for the bright blue sky and the soft fog and the gentle rain,
for the tree veiled in the season's first frost,
for the baby's laugh, for the touch of a hand
and the whispered "I love you."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Take a deep breath and do the difficult thing first.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

BERLIN: PROCLAMATION TO THE GERMAN NATION FEBRUARY 1, 1933
The National Government will regard it as its first and foremost duty
to revive in the nation the spirit of unity and co-operation.
It will preserve and defend those basic principles
on which our nation has been built.
It regards Christianity as the foundation of our national morality,
and the family as the basis of national life....
- Adolf Hitler

The first quality that is needed is audacity.
- Winston Churchill

Okay, here's your first lesson: how to take a FALL!
- the movie Karate Kid

During the first period of a man's life
the greatest danger is not to take the risk.
- Soren Kierkegaard

Let every day be the first day
of the rest of your life,
but especially let today be a new beginning.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Every really new idea looks crazy at first.
- Alfred North Whitehead

It is usually the imagination that is wounded first,
rather than the heart; it being much more sensitive.
- Henry David Thoreau

Life ... is like a parachute jump:
you have to get it right the first time.
- Margaret Mead

In rivers, the water that you touch
is the last of what has passed
and the first of that which comes;
so with present time.
- Leonardo da Vinci

Our "Rainbows and Butterflies" are the small miracles of our life -
the little things that are so easy to overlook,
yet so awe inspiring when we take a moment
to notice and to pay attention.
Give thanks for the rainbows, for the butterflies,
for all God's creatures - large and small,
for the bright blue sky and the soft fog and the gentle rain,
for the tree veiled in the season's first frost,
for the baby's laugh,
for the touch of a hand and the whispered "I love you."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Recognizing my blindness is the first step
toward regaining my sight.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Self-trust is the first secret of success.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Put on your own oxygen mask first.
- Airline companies

Know, first, who you are, and then adorn yourself accordingly.
- Epictetus

The care of human life and happiness, and not their destruction,
is the first and only object of good government.
- Thomas Jefferson

A holiday, the day I first named you, "friend."
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Courage is rightly esteemed the first of human qualities...
because it is the quality which guarantees all others.
- Winston Churchill

The secret of getting ahead is getting started.
The secret of getting started is
breaking your complex overwhelming tasks
into small manageable tasks,
and starting on the first one.
- Mark Twain

Be gentle first with yourself.
- Lama Yeshe

"Think simple" as my old master used to say -
meaning reduce the whole of its parts
into the simplest terms,
getting back to first principles.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

The second office in the government is honorable and easy;
the first is but a splendid misery.
- Thomas Jefferson

Habits are cobwebs at first, cables at last.
- Chinese proverb

The first step towards the solution
of any problem is optimism.
- John Baines

Whatever America hopes to bring to pass in the world
must first come to pass in the heart of America.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Be gentle first with yourself -
if you wish to be gentle with others.
- Lama Yeshe

The first step in the evolution of ethics
is a sense of solidarity with other human beings.
- Albert Schweitzer

Life is a journey. It is not a race to test
who can finish first or who can end up with the most loot.
Rather, life is best enjoyed as a meander -
watching the view to left and right - above and below -
as the days slowly move past in dress review.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If we could first know where we are,
and whither we are tending,
we could then better judge what to do,
and how to do it.
- Abraham Lincoln

If there is anything that we wish to change in the child,
we should first examine it and see whether it is
not something that could better be changed in ourselves.
- Carl Jung


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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