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Funny Quotes by Bridget Jones Diary

It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay,
another falls spectacularly to pieces.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary

Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband
a month before she marries him
and what she thinks of him a year afterward,
and you will have the truth about him.
- H. L. Mencken

Truth is a tendency.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

The lawyer's truth is not Truth,
but consistency or a consistent expediency.
- Henry David Thoreau

Always speak the truth,
think before you speak,
and write it down afterwards.
- Lewis Carroll

Truth is stranger than fiction,
but that is because Fiction is obliged
to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.
- Mark Twain

All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

The rarest quality in an epitaph is truth.
- Henry David Thoreau

By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin

Bad taste is simply saying the truth before it should be said.
- Mel Brooks

Man will occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
- Winston Churchill

Tell the truth, or someone will tell it for you.
- Stephanie Klein

If you are out to describe the truth,
leave elegance to the tailor.
- Albert Einstein

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
- Mark Twain

Truth is beautiful, without doubt; but so are lies.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

My way of joking is telling the truth;
that is the funniest joke in the world.
- George Bernard Shaw

If you're going to tell people the truth,
be funny or they'll kill you.
- Billy Wilder

The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
- Oscar Wilde

A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
- Will Rogers

The water in a vessel is sparkling;
the water in the sea is dark.
The small truth has words which are clear;
the great truth has great silence.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.
Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
- Oscar Wilde PHOTO

Keep the company of those who seek the truth;
run from those who have found it.
- V�clav Havel PHOTO

The truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing,
and should be treated with caution.
- J. K. Rowling PHOTO

Soon we'll be out amid the cold world's strife.
Soon we'll be sliding down the razor blade of life.
But as we go our sordid sep'rate ways,
We shall ne'er forget thee, thou golden college days.
Hearts full of youth,
Hearts full of truth,
Six parts gin to one part vermouth.
- Tom Lehrer - song: Bright College Days,
album: An Evening Wasted With Tom Lehrer

When a thing is funny, search it for a hidden truth.
- George Bernard Shaw PHOTO

The words of truth are always paradoxical.
- Lao Tzu PHOTO

Use the power of your word
in the direction of truth and love.
- don Miguel Ruiz PHOTO

We are not afraid to follow truth
wherever it may lead,
nor to tolerate any error
so long as reason is left free to combat it.
- Thomas Jefferson

Having a personal opinion is great.
Believing that one's personal opinion is absolute truth
leads to most of the world's troubles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Intense feeling too often obscures the truth.
- Harry S. Truman

We take refuge in pride,
because we are afraid to tell the truth to ourselves.
- Kakuzo Okakura

I am sorry to think that you do not get a man's
most effective criticism until you provoke him.
Severe truth is expressed with some bitterness.
- Henry David Thoreau

When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart,
and you shall see that in truth
you are weeping for that which has been your delight.
- Khalil Gibran

Every mind must make its choice
between truth and repose.
It cannot have both.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Our actions are constrained by fear of reprisal,
but our dreams reveal our true character.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The goal of education is the advancement of knowledge
and the dissemination of truth.
- John F. Kennedy

Truth is absolute, but only to one person.
My truth is absolute to me, and your truth is absolute to you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A man must be both stupid and uncharitable
who believes there is no virtue or truth but on his own side.
- Joseph Addison

Whoever is careless with the truth in small matters
cannot be trusted with important matters.
- Albert Einstein

There's a world of difference between truth and facts.
Facts can obscure truth.
- Maya Angelou

If you seek truth, you will not seek
victory by dishonorable means,
and if you find truth, you will become invincible.
- Epictetus

Truth is the property of no individual
but is the treasure of all men.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

If you shut the door to all errors,
truth will be shut out.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Truth is handsomer than the affectation of love.
Your goodness must have some edge to it, else it is none.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

In all of his bestsellers, the Divine has told the truth,
custom-tailored to the comprehension of the times.
- Ernest Holmes

We should not pretend to understand the world
only by the intellect.
The judgment of the intellect
is only part of the truth.
- Carl Jung

We must be ready to learn from one another,
not claiming that we alone possess all truth
and that somehow we have a corner on God.
- Archbishop Desmond Tutu

ANYONE may become a revealer of Truth
who lives in close contact with the indwelling God.
- Ernest Holmes

About most subjects, there is not "The Truth;"
there is merely one's personal truth.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

An error does not become truth
by reason of multiplied propagation,
nor does truth become error because nobody sees it.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Men occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of them pick themselves up
and hurry off as if nothing had happened.
- Winston Churchill

Even the truth, when believed, is a lie.
You must experience the truth, not believe it.
- Werner Erhard

In wartime, truth is so precious that she
should always be attended by a bodyguard of lies.
- Winston Churchill

We tell the real truth of our life
by the stories we repeatedly tell.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

If you wish to see the truth,
then hold no opinion for or against.
- Osho

I believe that it is better to tell the truth than a lie.
I believe it is better to be free than to be a slave.
And I believe it is better to know than to be ignorant.
- H.L. Mencken

Dispassionate objectivity is itself a passion,
for the real and for the truth.
- Abraham Maslow

It takes two to speak the truth:
one to speak, and another to hear.
- Henry David Thoreau

There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth;
not going all the way, and not starting.
- The Buddha

The presence of those seeking the truth
is infinitely to be preferred
to the presence of those who think they've found it.
- Terry Pratchett

All the religions of the world,
while they may differ in other respects,
unitedly proclaim that nothing lives in this world but Truth.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

This is my wish for you:
Comfort on difficult days,
Smiles when sadness intrudes,
Rainbows to follow the clouds,
Laughter to kiss your lips,
Sunsets to warm your heart,
Hugs when spirits sag,
Beauty for your eyes to see,
Friendships to brighten your being,
Faith so that you can believe,
Confidence for when you doubt,
Courage to know yourself,
Patience to accept the truth,
Love to complete your life.
- Anonymous

Truth has no special time of its own.
Its hour is now - always.
- Albert Schweitzer

A day spent without the sight or sound of beauty,
the contemplation of mystery,
or the search of truth or perfection
is a poverty-stricken day; and a succession
of such days is fatal to human life.
- Lewis Mumford

The false can never grow into truth by growing in power.
- Rabindranath Tagore

You must accept the truth from whatever source it comes.
- Maimonides

There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth
- not going all the way and not starting.
- The Buddha

Love is the ultimate meaning of everything around us.
Love is not a mere sentiment.
Love is the ultimate truth at the heart of creation.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Fear is not in the habit of speaking truth.
- Publius Cornelius Tacitus

The great enemy of the truth is very often not the lie,
deliberate, contrived and dishonest,
but the myth, persistent, persuasive and unrealistic.
- John F. Kennedy

Bigotry tries to keep truth safe in its hand
with a grip that kills it.
- Rabindranath Tagore


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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